jupitersunrise

gah that toothpaste was desgusting
my mouth tastes like chalk right now
or at least, what i'd imagine chalk to taste like

i'm all confused about life again
i know what i want but i know i'm not finding it

i have made a pact to myself about something
i wrote it down on a piece of paper
then signed my name
i'm going to keep it in my wallet, over my license
i have to start being true to myself

i am leaving for florida at 4:30 tomorrow morning
i have never been on a plane before
and it doesn't seem real that i'm going to wake up
get on a plane
and be in florida
all within a matter of hours
probably doesn't seem like a big deal
but you might not understand

i
never
go
anywhere
.ever.

i saw one of my best friends this weekend
i've known him since i was a kid
he's been camping at my campground forever
it was good to see him after the long winter
we hung out til 12:30 am last night, and then all day today
he took me mudding in his truck - i felt like a hick
but it was still pretty damn fun
and now he's gone so i'm bored!

i've realized lately that i have quite a few guy friends
i never thought i could be friends with guys
because i never understood them
but now they make up the same number of my girl friends, roughly

i wish i could be honest and do what i know i need to do

any day now