junecleavage

It always surprises me the way that music can land you right back into a moment, a minute of a memory, a morning slice out of sleep, a yesterday.
Even more surprising, I think, is the fact that I have come to finally grasp that you can revisit the memory and not necessarily have to revisit the person or the moment.
That was the thing I wrestled with all these yearsthat seeing or hearing or feeling some piece of history meant that I had to autopilot into reconnecting with that place in history.
History is just that.
History.
A done deal.
I can watch it like a movie but I dont have to invite it into present day.
That was the part I wasnt getting.
The revisit through movie reels as opposed to actual re-connection.
I dont really know what in my obsessive compulsive nature has allowed decade old slivers of time to seem like such pretty flowers in retrospect.
The reality is that they wilted as all flowers do.
They grew elsewhere into something else.
Someone elses garden.
Someone elses muck.
Anyway the lyrics to this "Peeping Tom" Mike Patton songt hat has not been released yet but given to me from the fucking coolest coldenginelogic go out to one of those once pretty flowersMaybe he could have even been a mighty tiger lily/bird of paradise but really he just ended up a pansy in the end.

"I know that assholes grow on trees
But I need to trim the leaves
And I'm afraid
That you're still my friend
You're still a piece of shit
But I can open up in today
Cause you're still my friend."