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jumpstreet

Orlando, FL

Member Since 2004

Followers 66 Following 100

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Monday Jul 04, 2005

Jul 4, 2005
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Who wants to see fireworks when you can get run off the road on I-4?

Driving home from dinner with my folks at Cracker Barrel (of all places), I'm in the fast lane and I notice this car with its hazzards on, looked like a flat--but he was still driving slowly. Don't know exactly what the fuck it was but he veered slightly into my lane. I thought I tapped my breaks, but for whatever reason, my car made a 90-degree turn and I slammed into a ditch.

1) I didn't freak. The only thing going through my mind was "This is going to suck."
2) Jane's Addiction "Stop" was playing on the radio.
3) With how quick everything was, I am thankful (and surprised) I didn't slam into the orange barrels on the side of the road or that my car didn't hit anyone and vice versa.
4) There was no life-flashing-before-my-eyes moment. I recall thinking, "not yet."

It's weird having a moment like this . . . my mom told me not to get a motorcycle because that would be my "quickest way to heaven" when we were leaving the restaurant parking lot. My shit-wagon could've been the vessel taking me to the sweethereafter! I'm still slightly freaked.

The guy who was driving his shit-heap managed to cross to where I was--he pulled his car off to the opposite side of the road. I asked him if he was okay. Didn't understand a word he said through his accent. He shouldn't have been driving if he had that flat, he should have pulled over earlier.

Wow. If Tuesday couldn't come because of the various alternates which could've happened . . . I don't even want to think about that shit.

My folks came out to the gas station I pulled into . . . they fly out tomorrow. I said my good-byes and celebrated not dying with a Starbucks drink and some pizza-flavored Combos.

I'd like to thank Luis, the road-ranger who pulled my car out of the marsh I crashed into for getting me out for free. Apparently, he was driving eastbound and saw me spin out into the ditch. How weird was that? I gave him my card and told him if he needed a burger or a concert, I would hook him up.

Did I already say "wow" yet? If I couldn't make it to Tuesday . . .

I'm still freaked.

Fuck.

puke

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