Happy Birthday To Me:
There are some days where you find yourself, pants down, staring intently at the hair surrounding your nipples, your feet surrounded by a litter of empty beer, wine and gin bottles, ashamed that your body has somehow come to resemble the staypuff marshmallow man. You get angry and dejected at your Genetics, and curse the proxy Gods, Darwin, Newton, that you...
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There are some days where you find yourself, pants down, staring intently at the hair surrounding your nipples, your feet surrounded by a litter of empty beer, wine and gin bottles, ashamed that your body has somehow come to resemble the staypuff marshmallow man. You get angry and dejected at your Genetics, and curse the proxy Gods, Darwin, Newton, that you...
Read More
Recipe Of The Week: Chilli Calamari
INGREDIENTS:
Calamari/Squid
Chilli Powder
Pineapple
Chilli Flakes
Salt
Flour
Oil
INSTRUCTIONS:
Score a big cut of squid/calamari like a pineapple, with back and forth dicing. This enables it to curl when frying. Now slice into smaller, long pieces.
In a plastic bag, put salt, chilli powder, flour and a few chilli flakes. Put calamari pieces into bag and shake...
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INGREDIENTS:
Calamari/Squid
Chilli Powder
Pineapple
Chilli Flakes
Salt
Flour
Oil
INSTRUCTIONS:
Score a big cut of squid/calamari like a pineapple, with back and forth dicing. This enables it to curl when frying. Now slice into smaller, long pieces.
In a plastic bag, put salt, chilli powder, flour and a few chilli flakes. Put calamari pieces into bag and shake...
Read More
Lets go back to the start, Sweetheart
It started with a kiss & ended with your fists
I have a black spot in the middle of my eyes
Its kind of like a thought, but it comes full circle
I get cross eyed just thinking of you
What came first the chicken or the rabbit,
In the headlights we fight
We just might try to...
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It started with a kiss & ended with your fists
I have a black spot in the middle of my eyes
Its kind of like a thought, but it comes full circle
I get cross eyed just thinking of you
What came first the chicken or the rabbit,
In the headlights we fight
We just might try to...
Read More
More Bad Teenage Poetry: I found this one in an old notebook, no idea where or when I wrote it, but it still makes me laugh.
Hand in hand they walked
down darkened alley
in drunken states
she talked of vagina
he talked of salt
they looked at eachother and laughed
a smile, a moment
nothing more, nothing less
this is the essence of friendship...
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Hand in hand they walked
down darkened alley
in drunken states
she talked of vagina
he talked of salt
they looked at eachother and laughed
a smile, a moment
nothing more, nothing less
this is the essence of friendship...
Read More
Short Story Tuesday
Purge
Repulsed
Influence
Smog
Ruby Red
Simply
Imaginative
Test
Marriage
Underestimate
The Test
Lily hestiantely entered the room, her face a downpour, a landslide of foundation, mascara purging from her eyes. A black thought cloud hung above her head in a smog of doom. The white walls were in great contrast to the black mood she was extruding from above and around...
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Purge
Repulsed
Influence
Smog
Ruby Red
Simply
Imaginative
Test
Marriage
Underestimate
The Test
Lily hestiantely entered the room, her face a downpour, a landslide of foundation, mascara purging from her eyes. A black thought cloud hung above her head in a smog of doom. The white walls were in great contrast to the black mood she was extruding from above and around...
Read More
Recipe Of The Week: Turkey Bolognese
I only discovered Turkey Mince through neccesity one day when my taste-buds desired the hefty, hearty taste of either Beef or Lamb mince but couldnt afford it. So I turned to the cheap and surprisingly very healthy alternative of 500g Turkey Mince for $4.95 which ends up being able to feed about 4 people. The healthy factor was taken...
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I only discovered Turkey Mince through neccesity one day when my taste-buds desired the hefty, hearty taste of either Beef or Lamb mince but couldnt afford it. So I turned to the cheap and surprisingly very healthy alternative of 500g Turkey Mince for $4.95 which ends up being able to feed about 4 people. The healthy factor was taken...
Read More
Thoughts at 10:54 on a Sunday Night:
Mike Pattons sinister laugh through a megaphone is still echoing in my ears as I see her illuminated, drowned in red light that frames her features. There is a spider in front of us, and I remember the half eaten green apple covered in dust & the hardcore Cowboy that slam-danced in front of us.
Also, can't get...
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Mike Pattons sinister laugh through a megaphone is still echoing in my ears as I see her illuminated, drowned in red light that frames her features. There is a spider in front of us, and I remember the half eaten green apple covered in dust & the hardcore Cowboy that slam-danced in front of us.
Also, can't get...
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You take my hand,
I embrace your fragile figure
Under this moonlight, that lights these dead trees in such a way.
Fairy lights are draped across the most unpurposeful of places
Upon a clothesline on a desert island patch of concrete
We dance, and you smile
That crooked smile of yours
I look up and notice we are in a strangers backyard,
The most intimate...
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I embrace your fragile figure
Under this moonlight, that lights these dead trees in such a way.
Fairy lights are draped across the most unpurposeful of places
Upon a clothesline on a desert island patch of concrete
We dance, and you smile
That crooked smile of yours
I look up and notice we are in a strangers backyard,
The most intimate...
Read More
Short Story Tuesday
I am given ten words from the mouth of my friend Sommer.
I am then to turn said words into something structured and elaborate that somewhat resembles a story.
Welcome to a new weekly segment called Short Story Tuesdays.
Acid Balls & Deadfalls (Diamonds & Detriments)
Enjoyment
Lame
Reciprocate
Tangible
Lament
Reiterate
Wrong
Hot
Futile
Little
Benjamin had been here before, but...
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I am given ten words from the mouth of my friend Sommer.
I am then to turn said words into something structured and elaborate that somewhat resembles a story.
Welcome to a new weekly segment called Short Story Tuesdays.
Acid Balls & Deadfalls (Diamonds & Detriments)
Enjoyment
Lame
Reciprocate
Tangible
Lament
Reiterate
Wrong
Hot
Futile
Little
Benjamin had been here before, but...
Read More
We Can Never Go Back: (The I Dont Want To Fuck You Hypothesis)
This is a story of boy meets girl.
Anton Bergh grew up believing he would never be happy until he met The One. This stemmed from a childhood full of pop music with undertones of misery, syndicated american sitcoms, and the abandonment he felt every time he suffered the loss of a...
Read More
This is a story of boy meets girl.
Anton Bergh grew up believing he would never be happy until he met The One. This stemmed from a childhood full of pop music with undertones of misery, syndicated american sitcoms, and the abandonment he felt every time he suffered the loss of a...
Read More