Cocktail party at 250.
The parties at 250 are always fun, but this was a little weird for me, not neccesarily in an interesting way. First of all, we were all dressed up like respectable adults, owing to the fact that it was a cocktail party. Still, I expected the usual debauchery, as we're talking about 250 here.
When I get there, there are real adults. Not just us twenty-something-pseudo-adults-I'm-the-only-respectable-one-cause-I-actually-work-40-hours-a-week adults, but people who probably have kids, or at least dogs they treat like kids (that's probably not fair, but it paints you a better picture). So of course, I am a little tenuous about getting drunk, and am in even less of a party mood when my ex-girlfriend shows up. Quick note here; it's been well long enough for me to get over her, so absolutely no sympathy is deserved. Anyway, I'm having a good time and dancing and talking to these cute Smith College girls, getting over my whole shyness thing and general inability to have a good time when Liz is in the room.
One of my friends is trying to hook me up with one of the Smith girls. No, not the cute upperclassman who he wants to make out with while his girlfriend is abroad, but the cute first year. I'm gonna apologise to anyone who may be a freshman, but seriously, I'm 23, and I don't need to be messing around with any 18 year old girls, especially 18 year old Smith girls.
Here, my inability to write in my own voice comes through. I'm fairly decent at inventing dialogue, but not in journal form. I don't mean to sound like I'm complaining, these are just observations. I'm not really bothered.
For instance, I'm one of two in my group of friends who is single. EZ's girl broke up with him in wicked harsh fashion as he was getting ready to fly to New Zealand to see her. So that's his excuse. I am picky, on a foolishly grand or grandly foolish scale. Maybe both. Also, I have lost my desire for random hookups. This is seriously unfortunate, because there's nothing wrong with my libido.
The problem is that I'm truly in love with Liz, no matter what she wants to think about it. OK, that would be sad if I was still following her like a lost puppy, big eyes and all, but that's not the case. I've dealt with that the way I needed to, but I still miss having that connection. Who wants a casual fuck when you've been with someone you truly love? It's just not as fun, and I find I could probably do the Sunday crossword puzzle when I'm with someone else. As trite as it sounds, fucking Liz was magic.
So I clearly need to find someone new, but I'm so goddamn impatient. I was in an idiotic relationship with a second year from September till March. She was so not my type and was completely unable to connect with any of my friends in even the most superficial way, such as saying 'hello' to them when they answered my phone. But I was hoping we could at least have a moderately good relationship once we got through the bullshit getting-to-know-you phase.
Then she got all clingy and told me she loved me while we were fucking, which she denied before I could even call her on it. What the fuck? That was decent grounds to break up with her. She had a bad habit of doing things like that. Tell me you didn't mean it, or suck it up and confess. She wasn't willing to do either.
So I'm crushing hard on this girl she plays ultimate with, which I know makes me a bastard for even thinking about it, but... She's an awesome person, and did I mention amazingly hot? And mature. Imagine that. The best part is, she's 21, which is an age I can deal with, even if she'll be a senior next year. Hope springs eternal. Will anything change for Juice? Tune in next week for the conclusion to this episode's dramatic cliffhanger.
By the way, I tried an experiment tonight: I decided to flirt with Liz at the party. I couldn't tell if it bothered her, but it didn't affect me either way. So far so good.
Now all I need is a publisher for this novel, and I'll be set. And I swear, I'm not drunk.
The parties at 250 are always fun, but this was a little weird for me, not neccesarily in an interesting way. First of all, we were all dressed up like respectable adults, owing to the fact that it was a cocktail party. Still, I expected the usual debauchery, as we're talking about 250 here.
When I get there, there are real adults. Not just us twenty-something-pseudo-adults-I'm-the-only-respectable-one-cause-I-actually-work-40-hours-a-week adults, but people who probably have kids, or at least dogs they treat like kids (that's probably not fair, but it paints you a better picture). So of course, I am a little tenuous about getting drunk, and am in even less of a party mood when my ex-girlfriend shows up. Quick note here; it's been well long enough for me to get over her, so absolutely no sympathy is deserved. Anyway, I'm having a good time and dancing and talking to these cute Smith College girls, getting over my whole shyness thing and general inability to have a good time when Liz is in the room.
One of my friends is trying to hook me up with one of the Smith girls. No, not the cute upperclassman who he wants to make out with while his girlfriend is abroad, but the cute first year. I'm gonna apologise to anyone who may be a freshman, but seriously, I'm 23, and I don't need to be messing around with any 18 year old girls, especially 18 year old Smith girls.
Here, my inability to write in my own voice comes through. I'm fairly decent at inventing dialogue, but not in journal form. I don't mean to sound like I'm complaining, these are just observations. I'm not really bothered.
For instance, I'm one of two in my group of friends who is single. EZ's girl broke up with him in wicked harsh fashion as he was getting ready to fly to New Zealand to see her. So that's his excuse. I am picky, on a foolishly grand or grandly foolish scale. Maybe both. Also, I have lost my desire for random hookups. This is seriously unfortunate, because there's nothing wrong with my libido.
The problem is that I'm truly in love with Liz, no matter what she wants to think about it. OK, that would be sad if I was still following her like a lost puppy, big eyes and all, but that's not the case. I've dealt with that the way I needed to, but I still miss having that connection. Who wants a casual fuck when you've been with someone you truly love? It's just not as fun, and I find I could probably do the Sunday crossword puzzle when I'm with someone else. As trite as it sounds, fucking Liz was magic.
So I clearly need to find someone new, but I'm so goddamn impatient. I was in an idiotic relationship with a second year from September till March. She was so not my type and was completely unable to connect with any of my friends in even the most superficial way, such as saying 'hello' to them when they answered my phone. But I was hoping we could at least have a moderately good relationship once we got through the bullshit getting-to-know-you phase.
Then she got all clingy and told me she loved me while we were fucking, which she denied before I could even call her on it. What the fuck? That was decent grounds to break up with her. She had a bad habit of doing things like that. Tell me you didn't mean it, or suck it up and confess. She wasn't willing to do either.
So I'm crushing hard on this girl she plays ultimate with, which I know makes me a bastard for even thinking about it, but... She's an awesome person, and did I mention amazingly hot? And mature. Imagine that. The best part is, she's 21, which is an age I can deal with, even if she'll be a senior next year. Hope springs eternal. Will anything change for Juice? Tune in next week for the conclusion to this episode's dramatic cliffhanger.
By the way, I tried an experiment tonight: I decided to flirt with Liz at the party. I couldn't tell if it bothered her, but it didn't affect me either way. So far so good.
Now all I need is a publisher for this novel, and I'll be set. And I swear, I'm not drunk.