joyrider

* oh, before i forget: you should check out some of the bands on temporary residence. attn: space rock fans. the Fridge and Sonna / Sybarite / Lilenthal tracks (spanish guitar cum seefeel) are good, espeshally.

i miss cashew. being aware, remembering i shouldn't, is very hard. i had a random thought earlier: "i should clean cashew's house" - then felt far away and very helpless.

i am reading too many books: 3. normally i can do three at a time, but i get the feeling that i should lay off the heavy for a while. i am already deep into myself right now, everything is big Is and ego ego ego. my skin is keeping everything out, keeping people out. i shouldn't hold on to things the way i do. it puts me at weird vectors.

i have been thinking a lot about love lately. my last two relationships shared something at the root level that i'd overlooked. it hit me this, and i've been feeling it pretty hard. i caught myself listening to old soundtracks.

it's cold. i am going to find my cat and sleep now.