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joshof13thfloor

McMinnville,TN

Member Since 2003

Followers 100 Following 156

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Friday Nov 14, 2003

Nov 14, 2003
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I am a zombie.

Sleep apnea is like being stuck somewhere between life and death; never fully awake, never fully rested.

It affects my mind. My memory is faulty at best and i constantly find myself drawing a blank when trying to explain myself to those around me.

I want so badly to dig myself out of this hole that my life is in right now but i'm just to damn weary to get it done.

Everyone around me seems to be so concerned with my getting the help i need and my getting better but at the same time none of them seem to understand that my condition leaves me both mentally and physically exahausted at nearly all times.

I would all but kill the next person i see to get my mind back from this state it's in. I want to be able to move ahead with my plans for the comics. I can barely even carry on a decent coversation about my own stories and characters anymore. Most of the time i end up losing the words i'm looking for. I feel all to often like a total idiot because of this.

I'm so fucking tired right now.

So fucking tired, yet i can not sleep.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
helm:
my mind gets filled with hate and despair, than I'm pretty much useless for anything but a boob in front of the tube. Life is a sick game that we all try to play with all our hearts, but we'll eventually lose in the end.

Man, I'm piss poor at trying to cheer anyone up.
Nov 15, 2003
sakita:
im just going thru and saying hi!
hope things are looking up today
if they arent then i will have to put a picture in my pics section gauranteed to make you laugh!

take care...let me know if i need to put one there.
Nov 15, 2003

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