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joshguy

Baltimore City

Member Since 2004

Followers 10 Following 14

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Monday May 09, 2005

May 9, 2005
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I had a long talk to brother tontie about the cosmos.

but you should know about my brother first.

He is 36 years old. he lives in a van down by the river. no...thats false.. hehe

He is 36 years old. he is a recovering junk adict. he is a parapalegic. he was shot in 1996 at a 7-11 on harford rd. in parkville. he was robbed and much like me and all teens, thought he was invinsible and walked away when the guy asked for his money. the guy shot him in the back and now he'll never walk again. he has intense nerve damage which he describes to me as "imagine someone had pliars on your taint and twisted every 10 seconds" the only thing that ever helped his pain was junk. thats where his junk habit came in. but thats enough about my brother. back to what we talked about tonite.

he explained to me tonite that he wants to live his life through me. since he got shot, he doesnt leave the house very much. he had very little will to live even. so i spend most of my days at his house spending time with him. i honestly believe thats why i havent been able to hold a gf. i feel like if they cant accept that i would rather spend time with my brother then them, i feel they are selfish. at least you have a life. you can leave and go do something. my brother cant. he can only spend 2 hours a day sitting up because of his nerve damage and other problems caused from paralisis. when i go to see my brother, its not like im ditching you for him. its i have to see him. imagine going 3 days not leaving the house and not seeing anyone. it gets old real fast. and having no will to live and once being truley suicidal, i dont like to spend a single day not seeing him.

so he says he lives his life through me, when it can be inturprted the other way around. i live my life through him. everything i do now a days is for him. i wont go anywhere far away without stopping to see him first.

one day he will be better and the day he does...we will do eevrything we talkabout. weve talked about building a house. rockclimbing again. skydiving. but its so hard to talk about that to him because he was so active and now he has trouble even getting into a car..

im rambling..so off topic..haha..

<3-Josh Guy ARRR!!!
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
mrmiddlefinger:
Dude, you would be a kick-ass brother to have... Your parents looking to adopt? I'm potty trained (just in case they ask)...
May 11, 2005
laika:
You are a good person, and any girl who cant accept the way it is, well she isnt worth your time anyway. kiss
May 11, 2005

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