Well, it's ending. My marriage, that is. And it's a shame because I kind of liked it. She seems pretty set on this being it though. I think she has hung on longer than she probably should have, frankly, but I really hate to see her go. I think we'll try to still be friends. She doesn't hate me, but there are just big things that she has needed to change for a long time that are definitely not going to change in the next couple of years while I'm in law school, and will probably never change. I don't want to tell the kids. I have to eventually though. I think we're going to wait until they get back from their vacation to Florida with their mother. That's in about three weeks. We won't be ready to actually do any splitting until then anyway.
As bad as this is, there are some bright sides. I have basically been "the married guy" all through law school, and I hate it. I am not less committed than other students because I am married. In fact, I'm one of the most committed students here. I have been holding back though because I have been trying to save my marriage. Now I can do all of the things that I want to. I'm looking forward to getting an apartment and living the bachelor life again. The kids will have to go with their mom, but I have dealt with that before. Then there's the one really good thing.
I met a girl. The very day that my wife told me that she was done, I went to a graduation party at a friend's house (to get things off my mind for a bit), and her sister was there. Her sister is fucking perfect. We hit it off, kissed a little when nobody was looking. We hung out a couple of times at events this weekend, and she says she wants to see me again. She lives in Chicago, which is a long ways away, but not insurmountable. Anyway, I needed a new spark. Maybe I'm just not meant for married life.
Ugh. This is like the worst-written blog ever. There's just so much to write and so little faculty. I have to start up work for the summer tomorrow. I should be sleeping, but that's not possible right now. I need distraction.
This is my weekend:
As bad as this is, there are some bright sides. I have basically been "the married guy" all through law school, and I hate it. I am not less committed than other students because I am married. In fact, I'm one of the most committed students here. I have been holding back though because I have been trying to save my marriage. Now I can do all of the things that I want to. I'm looking forward to getting an apartment and living the bachelor life again. The kids will have to go with their mom, but I have dealt with that before. Then there's the one really good thing.
I met a girl. The very day that my wife told me that she was done, I went to a graduation party at a friend's house (to get things off my mind for a bit), and her sister was there. Her sister is fucking perfect. We hit it off, kissed a little when nobody was looking. We hung out a couple of times at events this weekend, and she says she wants to see me again. She lives in Chicago, which is a long ways away, but not insurmountable. Anyway, I needed a new spark. Maybe I'm just not meant for married life.
Ugh. This is like the worst-written blog ever. There's just so much to write and so little faculty. I have to start up work for the summer tomorrow. I should be sleeping, but that's not possible right now. I need distraction.
This is my weekend: