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jolene

SG Since 2002

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Monday Jan 06, 2003

Jan 6, 2003
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my heart is broken.

i haven't updated my journal in awhile for the simple fact that i haven't completely been able to address the issues that i have turned my life upside down.

2 weeks ago a very good friend from my high school days, noah, was hit by an un-insured driver while he was back to school after visiting his parents for the holidays. noah is now classified by doctors as a quadrapilegic. what makes me so fucking angry about this is the simple fact that noah was doing something with his life. he was a senior at u of o and was a term away from graduating. now he doesn't have feeling below his nipples. he has years of rehabilitation to look forward to. no insurance settlement to compinsate for the wheelchair he will spend the rest of his life in.

i will be auctioning items on ebay in the next few weeks so i will have some money to donate to his medical bills fund. if any of you are feeling especially kind today, i ask you to check out his story at www.noahsmith.org (if its up yet...i'm not sure, i haven't checked).

on januray 1, my friend oshana, was killed in a car wreck. this is all too fresh for me to touch on. maybe i'll explain the incident later. maybe not. i just want all of you to know that she was honestly one of the kindest people i have ever met in my entire life. she was too young to die so suddenly.

talk about a fucking depressing entry, eh? usually i have a heart of steel, but these 2 incidents and several others (that don't even deserve to be talked about in the same entry as oshana and noah) have shards of glass running through my veins. i'd like to be able to talk about my friends bands 7" that were just printed or how wonderful my new years was, but it all seems so irrelevant. completely irrelevant.

i want someone to pour my wounded heart out to. i want someone to cry and break things with. i need a hug. i need to hear a good joke. i need to call noah and tell him a good joke.
VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
soi:
Those that pass will live on forever, just as you will, all the good peoples get to live forever.
If I ever see you again you get hugged.
I know what ya mean about dealing, its something your not suppose to get use to, I think. Im down with stayin up, its been helpin me balance the time I have to share.
Take care.

Jan 9, 2003
olivia:
girl i am so sorry. i dunno what to say, i hope many hugs get piled on you and everyone affected.
Jan 13, 2003

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