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johnsonboy

the alley

Member Since 2004

Followers 13 Following 41

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Monday Mar 21, 2005

Mar 21, 2005
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Why did you get married?
I wanted to have more sex.[B
]Why did you get divorced?[/B
]I wanted to have more sex.

Even though for 4 of the 7 years I've been single I've slept alone and hardly even dated, It's true I've had more and better sex in that time than before the divorce.
What went wrong?
I'm always getting sex and love confused.

My first post-divorce girlfriend was insatiable sexually. She literally never got enough. It's not that I didn't try. It was a dream come true for 1 1/2 years. I missed her when she left. I loved her, but I loved her ass more than I did the rest of her.

The 2nd one came along over three years later. She also had a healthy appetite for the stuff, which I made the best of.
I had known her when we were kids but our romance came as kind of a surprise. Unfortunately I wasn't in love with her, which she deduced after a few months.
I was glad to be out of there.

The third one I met when I moved here.
It was one of those soft mutual seductions which take about 8 weeks to move from dating to bed.
While she is beautiful and sexy and in every way desirable to me, she is wary of commitment.
She is wary of me.
Our sex life was delicate and tenuous, lasting nearly one year but with never any guarantee. Each time we made love it was the first and the last time.
I miss her dearly. I still get to see her once in a while but the sex is over between us.
She's the first woman I slept with who gave me everything: physical, spiritual and intellectual, that I was looking for.
Apparently I didn't give the same satisfaction to her.
She's the one that got away.

None of this is working out the way I had it figured when I started.
I don't know if I'll want to get married again.
It would be nice to have someone in my bed, but at this point I don't know if I could deal with 24 hour a day company.
Is that even a good idea?
I feel as though I am drifting into the sky.
I don't want just anybody to grab my string.
I just want to make sure that if someone does grab it, they know what they're grabbing.
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
xip:
I wish there was only one kind of love. Yes, it would be boring, but at the same time, it would be much easier to choose/cope/understand. I'm in love with various people in entirely different ways but they all feel like the best way and they all feel like The One and it ALL feels like True Love. I hate that the word "One" defines the statement "One True Love."
xip
Mar 21, 2005
lolablu:
The idea of spending so much time with one person IS frightening, and rather inconceivable when that person is a hypothetical.

In my opinion, you can only know what you want romantically to a certain degree. It ends up becoming what you want with one specific person. So what I'm saying is: I don't think you have to know if you want to get married again in any abstract sense.

Some of love's best moments are surprises.
Mar 22, 2005

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