Lol, indeed, it is time for an update. But really a lot has changed since my last blog. For starters, Ive gotten a promotion at my job, benefits, and a pay raise. I now believe I have a steady, secure job doing what i like to do, so im happy in that sense. That's about the only thing Im happy with my life right now though.
Just over a year ago I had done something that may seem stupid to do to some, but for me it was the only thing I felt left that i could do. Ever since then one of the outcomes has been very poor memory with details. For instance, usually if i meet someone knew i have to keep looking up their info every time i talk to them or write notes about them, just so i know what Im talking about to them. Regardless of that, I have found myself slowly going down that path that initially drove me to do what i did a year ago.
So the situation now stands like this. The only friends that I actively see are the ones at work, outside of work there is really noone. Ive stopped using facebook and msn, mainly because those are social networking outlets, which i was slowly becomming less active on anyways. Ive been looking for help... but there really isnt much out there. The main reason for all this: my social skills. They are great at first, can come up with tons of things to say, make ppl laugh, outgoing, etc. After a while though, I start to lose things to talk about, and then the communication between my friends stops and we become distant (kinda like my blog postings). For any that can relate will know what im talking about but for those that dont..... Imagine your with a group of 2 others. Those 2 talk back and forth, u listen in. As for contributing to that conversation though, or carrying on it, it's pretty much impossible. You try to think of something to say but really can't. It's like they talk on a topic you have no knowledge on. Only for me, it's everyday things. And that's where my problems arise, everyday conversations. Hence, since pretty much every social event you goto there is conversation, i tend to avoid it.
It's really hard to explain exactly everything, but it takes it's toll on me to say the least. It takes me down a path Id much rather avoid. Despite the great things happening in my career, none of that matters if i cant be happy outside of it.
So for now, I continue searching, looking for that solution that's out there that will help solve my problems.
Talk to ya's later. Smile
Edit: PS - As for eating nutritious as one of my new year's resolution..... I have started to do so. Part of which is eating more fruits which i had rarely, if ever done b4
Just over a year ago I had done something that may seem stupid to do to some, but for me it was the only thing I felt left that i could do. Ever since then one of the outcomes has been very poor memory with details. For instance, usually if i meet someone knew i have to keep looking up their info every time i talk to them or write notes about them, just so i know what Im talking about to them. Regardless of that, I have found myself slowly going down that path that initially drove me to do what i did a year ago.
So the situation now stands like this. The only friends that I actively see are the ones at work, outside of work there is really noone. Ive stopped using facebook and msn, mainly because those are social networking outlets, which i was slowly becomming less active on anyways. Ive been looking for help... but there really isnt much out there. The main reason for all this: my social skills. They are great at first, can come up with tons of things to say, make ppl laugh, outgoing, etc. After a while though, I start to lose things to talk about, and then the communication between my friends stops and we become distant (kinda like my blog postings). For any that can relate will know what im talking about but for those that dont..... Imagine your with a group of 2 others. Those 2 talk back and forth, u listen in. As for contributing to that conversation though, or carrying on it, it's pretty much impossible. You try to think of something to say but really can't. It's like they talk on a topic you have no knowledge on. Only for me, it's everyday things. And that's where my problems arise, everyday conversations. Hence, since pretty much every social event you goto there is conversation, i tend to avoid it.
It's really hard to explain exactly everything, but it takes it's toll on me to say the least. It takes me down a path Id much rather avoid. Despite the great things happening in my career, none of that matters if i cant be happy outside of it.
So for now, I continue searching, looking for that solution that's out there that will help solve my problems.
Talk to ya's later. Smile
Edit: PS - As for eating nutritious as one of my new year's resolution..... I have started to do so. Part of which is eating more fruits which i had rarely, if ever done b4