jjay

So its been nice and wet here and I've been loving it. Nothing like a cold drenching rain to make you remember there is such a thing as seasons in this state. I've always loved this weather. I remember as a kid stomping through puddles as the rain soaked through the layers of clothes my mom would make me wear in occasions of "bad" weather, the warmth of the house as you came in from the storm, and the fresh smell of renewal the rain brought with it. In any case its put me in a good mood, which is great because I've been pretty tired of it all as of late. School is dragging me down and work adds to the load. I hate the schedule of it all, the conformity. But thats life right? I'm an adult now and this is what adults do. Or so I am told. But really I don't think I would have ever agreed to the whole mess if I knew it was like this. They must have slipped it in the fine print. An ole' switch-a-roo. It's funny to think that we spend most of our childhood years trying to be older, constantly testing our independence and when we finally get there all we want is a break from adulthood, to trade in all of it, the responsibilities and worries for a bit of excitement. Boredom becomes the theme of generations, hustle and bustle are everyones best friends and relief is just a drink away. No. I'm being too dramatic aren't I? I mean its not that bad. It has it's moments, right? I'm sure it does. I mean just look at the baby boomers. Their happy right? It would seem so but I don't think you could count my mother or father in that survey. No not her and probably not him where ever he is. But in any case your parents are happy right? They've fulfilled their dreams haven't they? White picket fence and all that...I mean thats what we need right, stability and comfort? Isn't that we all really want? Whats the rest of the world got to do with me? Hmmm...I still don't know if I like the sound of it all. Something seems wrong doesn't it? Like we forgot to pack something on this trip. Who knows really, people change, needs change, dreams change, happiness changes. Who am I to judge? Maybe I'll be just like all the rest, suit, tie and briefcase, a symbol of adulthood. But than again maybe I won't maybe I won't have a white picket fence at all or live in a Spanish style housing development. Maybe I'll just be. Whatever the hell that means. Time will tell, like always.