I've just finished watching A Very Long Engagement. And it hit so close to my heart and what I've been aching for in my relationship that I feel filled up with sorrow.
We had another one of our talks last night, after coming home from drinking. It started off the usual way of me being playful in saying let's have sex later, hoping he'd give some kind of a reaction to it and maybe be a little playful to. But all he ever says is, "Ok". And nothing. No playfulness, no excitement in his face.. just him sitting there in a slump. And I said, "Could you at least seem a bit more excited?" And then we had another of our arguments that gets us no where and we're going in circles.
He admits he has no passion. And I tell him it's like air to me. And that's why movies like that make my chest hurt and my eyes wet with tears.. I think I feel either emotionally moved to sorrow.. or depressed.. Neither one feels very good.. Especially with the apartment situation right now.
The irony of that is over a week ago he told me he was afraid that with our problems that we've been trying to work, his lack of passion and lustre for not just me but life, was that I would take this situation as an escape to leave him since we were in a lease together anymore and I've seemed so unhappy.
I won't lie that the thought has passed through my brain a few times, I don't know that it was thought on seriously.. but it has me guessing.. Which side of the blade will hurt less.
We had another one of our talks last night, after coming home from drinking. It started off the usual way of me being playful in saying let's have sex later, hoping he'd give some kind of a reaction to it and maybe be a little playful to. But all he ever says is, "Ok". And nothing. No playfulness, no excitement in his face.. just him sitting there in a slump. And I said, "Could you at least seem a bit more excited?" And then we had another of our arguments that gets us no where and we're going in circles.
He admits he has no passion. And I tell him it's like air to me. And that's why movies like that make my chest hurt and my eyes wet with tears.. I think I feel either emotionally moved to sorrow.. or depressed.. Neither one feels very good.. Especially with the apartment situation right now.
The irony of that is over a week ago he told me he was afraid that with our problems that we've been trying to work, his lack of passion and lustre for not just me but life, was that I would take this situation as an escape to leave him since we were in a lease together anymore and I've seemed so unhappy.
I won't lie that the thought has passed through my brain a few times, I don't know that it was thought on seriously.. but it has me guessing.. Which side of the blade will hurt less.
tubaart:
Hmmm. Sounds very familiar to me -- like he's suffering from depression. I'd seriously look into what options might be available to help him (and thus help you). I know that treatment has made a huge difference in my life -- a change very much for the better. 
bobbybattles:
geez