Remember...
update: I had a roommate in Korea, a good guy who had a very difficult childhood. I never got the whole story of what it was like for him growing up, but it wasn't what you'd wish on somebody, that's for sure. He decided at one point to change his life, and through that process decided to join the Air Force. Although he doesn't exactly look like a poster child for the military (kinda like me) he is one of the most dedicated Airman I've ever had the honor of working with. He got out of the maintenance career field and went into intelligence and it seems to be a good fit for him.
Before he enlisted he got married to the girl he'd been seeing for years. They stuck together through his deployments to shitty places and assignments to places that were marginally better. Unfortunately something happened while he was in Korea that happens to a lot of people that get assigned there. She ended up sleeping with his "best friend". I don't know how it happened or why, and it's none of my business. She told him that she never meant to hurt him and that she was truly sorry. They decided to try and work it out wen he got to Las Vegas (that's where he's assigned now). It didn't go quite as planned, and the last I heard she had moved back to Colorado (I think).
I hadn't heard from him in a while, so I decided to shoot him an e-mail today. I caught him up on things here and asked him to do the same. His reply was very brief:
"How do I say this? [She] was killed in a motorcycle accident on the 18th. I have no words. I'm just devastated."
I don't have the words either. She meant the world to him, even after the affair. I can't begin to understand what he's going through. What do you do in this situation, when a friend is going through something like this and you're helpless and thousands of miles away? That's how I feel, helpless and sad for my friend.
update: I had a roommate in Korea, a good guy who had a very difficult childhood. I never got the whole story of what it was like for him growing up, but it wasn't what you'd wish on somebody, that's for sure. He decided at one point to change his life, and through that process decided to join the Air Force. Although he doesn't exactly look like a poster child for the military (kinda like me) he is one of the most dedicated Airman I've ever had the honor of working with. He got out of the maintenance career field and went into intelligence and it seems to be a good fit for him.
Before he enlisted he got married to the girl he'd been seeing for years. They stuck together through his deployments to shitty places and assignments to places that were marginally better. Unfortunately something happened while he was in Korea that happens to a lot of people that get assigned there. She ended up sleeping with his "best friend". I don't know how it happened or why, and it's none of my business. She told him that she never meant to hurt him and that she was truly sorry. They decided to try and work it out wen he got to Las Vegas (that's where he's assigned now). It didn't go quite as planned, and the last I heard she had moved back to Colorado (I think).
I hadn't heard from him in a while, so I decided to shoot him an e-mail today. I caught him up on things here and asked him to do the same. His reply was very brief:
"How do I say this? [She] was killed in a motorcycle accident on the 18th. I have no words. I'm just devastated."
I don't have the words either. She meant the world to him, even after the affair. I can't begin to understand what he's going through. What do you do in this situation, when a friend is going through something like this and you're helpless and thousands of miles away? That's how I feel, helpless and sad for my friend.
tangledupinblue:
you do the best you can, whatever you think that is. Just be the best you you feel you can be, and they find that a comfort, in asmuch as they can take comfort now :::shrug::: at least, looking back that's how I feel it in retrospect and try to do it for other people now.
josephene:
yeah, what trash said...we've all been there, and being on the other end teaches us how to react to those who are going through something like this. My heart aches for him, and I'm sure there's a feeling of helplessness that's lurking inside of you. Find comfort in the fact that if he needs you, he'll come to you. I'm sorry for your loss, too, honey.
*GYFS*
*GYFS*