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jerry031

Burlington, KY

Member Since 2003

Followers 6 Following 5

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Wednesday Nov 24, 2004

Nov 23, 2004
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Warning: Mindless self-indulgence...

I've been dealing with an issue I have with myself, and I'm going to share this with you fine folks.

I'm going to be 33 in two months. You can count all of my significant relationships on one hand and have a finger left over. Now, multiply that number by approximately 4.2 and you have the total number of months that I've been in relationships. That's right, out of almost 33 years, I've been in any kind of serious relationship for a total of just over 16 months.

What does that mean? Well, I'm not good at relationships. Actually, a better statement would be that I'm not good at choosing relationships. I get involved with women whom I have no chance of a future with. Two long disance relationships, a young divorcee, etc... I don't have enough to offer to overcome the kinds of issues that seem to rear their ugly heads in these types of situations. Of course, if I happen to find somebody close, I find a way to sabotage it. Or I end up dating somebody that really should have remained a one night stand.

I'm not good at ending relationships, either. In my defense, I didn't end any of my significant relationships (well, as significant as 6 months can be). But I have a knack of finding ways to make it so they never want to come back. Of course, I've been dumped via both answering machine and e-mail, so if I'm a little subconsciously bitter there may be a good reason. Anyway, I always find just the right word to piss her off enough that any thought of reconciliation is out of the question. I guess I'd rather end it in it's entirety than leave any ambiguity.

I don't keep momentos, either. I don't have one single photo of past girl-friends. Zero. It's easier to live with the pain without having physical reminders around, I guess.

Some people are destined to be alone. I'm one of those people, I guess. I have really great friends, though; friends I'll be returning to shortly. That's enough for me. As time goes by, I believe more and more that it's going to have to be.


Lonliness is not a phase...Field of pain is where I graze...Serenity so far away


Oh, hey. I almost forgot. I just got finished with the last war-game I'm gonna have to play here in Korea. 21 days and I go home. Wahoo!!!
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
catiedid:
i didn't know i could ask for stuff from Turkey Claws! WOW, think of all the years i wasted....

i hope you have a good day as well. not sure how you all celebrate Thanksgiving on a base in Korea, but I hope it's a good one.

i'm assuming they both end the same, but just in case i will read them both and let you know wink

kiss kiss
Nov 24, 2004
catiedid:
what good is Turkey Claws if he doesn't bring you what you want?!?! fucker...
Nov 24, 2004

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