jeremyejones

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Circa: About a year ago

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Boy and girl have obtained a pizza. Boy places pizza on area of bigsoftcushything where they will sit and watch a movie. Boy goes to get beverage and sits back down upon bigsoftcushything. Wondering where his food has gone, boy has a lost look about him. Boy suddenly realizes he's sat on pizza. Girl notices and laughs at him. He hops up in dismay.

Boy: Dismay! (moan)
Girl: Mockery!

Boy sighs and sullenly goes to sit back down.

Girl: No! Don't just continue sitting in it! You have to wash it before the stain sets in!
Boy: Oh, right.

Boy walks to the bathroom where he juts his bottom out toward the sink and tries arduously to place it in the sink basin. He can't get it under the faucet, so he turns the wate on and begins to blindly splash water AT his bottom with his hand.

Girl: What the hell are you doing?
Boy: Washing it off.
Girl: ...
Boy: ...
Girl: Why don't you just take your pants OFF?
Boy: Oh. Oh!

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I really do have quite a high IQ, honest.

No, really.

Fine.