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jenbat

Well I guess its Jax FL now....

Member Since 2004

Followers 20 Following 38

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Tuesday Nov 01, 2005

Nov 1, 2005
0
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Will I never be enough?
Not what you had in mind, I know
Even years later still not fitting your mold
Cant or wont be the cookie cutter you want
Do I give up my will for the sake of love?
Is it easier?
No thoughts or decisions of my own?
To be a shell
To be hollow
To be void
Is that what it means to be happy?
To give in
To be overcome
Seems a simpler existence
No internal struggle to get in the way
No battle for determining my own self worth if only your views are upheld
What do my feelings or ideals matter?
I have to spend eternity with myself regardless, so really what substance does my self image hold?
Perhaps it would make more sense not to struggle
Not to be assertive
Let it all wash over
Wear the obedient smile
Maybe Amazons arent so strong after all....

More Blogs

  • 10.25.05
    0

    Tuesday Oct 25, 2005

    Le suck. Had to go to the ER yesterday. Been sick for like a week…
  • 10.17.05
    2

    Monday Oct 17, 2005

    Wowzers!!!! What a fuckin birthday week! Super awesome! I shall reca…
  • 10.15.05
    0

    Saturday Oct 15, 2005

    Yeah for parties! Im getting drunk! Tummy is nice and warm! Wooo!
  • 10.03.05
    3

    Monday Oct 03, 2005

    Alright kids and kiddies! My bday is coming and with it comes a drun…
  • 09.24.05
    1

    Saturday Sep 24, 2005

    Life is strange. I may be heartless and cruel in the mind of others, …
  • 09.13.05
    2

    Tuesday Sep 13, 2005

    " Did your heart ever want to ask something but your head was too afr…
  • 09.07.05
    1

    Thursday Sep 08, 2005

    I want to be strong like an Amazon..... I am scared and paranoid a…
  • 08.24.05
    2

    Thursday Aug 25, 2005

    Ack! Seems like no matter how much I say Im going to keep up I dont..…
  • 07.14.05
    3

    Thursday Jul 14, 2005

    Well who's ready for a nice shcizo update? Then : June 25-July …
  • 06.18.05
    6

    Saturday Jun 18, 2005

    5 things you dont know about me 1. I am a neurotic mess. I am plag…

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