jcup

I have found inspiration. If I could be inside her all the time I would declare her womb my new place of residence. I watch her as she sleeps and stroke her hair and rub her back and arms. I have a very content smile when laying next to her. She sleeps like a little princess. And she's as passionate as a romance novel. And...
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Man... I was heated last night. That journal entry was some furious shit. I couldnt give a fuck today though. People fuck over each other all the time. It doesnt matter to the people doing it... so why should I give a fuck? Chalk it up to the game. I was listening to this rhyme this morning and it said " bloods' thicker than water,...
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I spent the whole nite helping out my "girlfriends". I got left at a bar alone. It shows how much it pays off when you try to help. I got stranded while they dealt with their drama and got fucked. I bought a nice piece of jewelrey for one of them tonight and I am supposebly the others best friend. Im not that guy. Why...
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Its so funny how much people change with anything. I wish i would've stayed at my homegirls house i,e, You Dawn. I am a mean M.,F,er and I just got duped by my own homegirls. I expect loyalty. I just had an arguement about that. I will never fail. I kill, destroy, and love for who I protect. I wish love was the same way...
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I was looking in the paper for studio apts downtown. And after looking I realized that I could pay less for a studio downtown Portland. And the studio would most likely be nicer. It made me wonder what the fuck im doing. Im getting far too comfortable here. I dont even like living here. So basicly Ive settled for less. Thats no good. I found...
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I've been changing who I hang out with. I surprisingly was able to do this in a matter of days. There was too much negativity, drama, and waste with the people I was around everday. You become effected by who you surround yourself with. I want to enjoy my life and be constantly striving for goals. I want to be happy and content with where...
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The sexiest album ever is Lovage by Dan the automator. Anyone reading this needs to download Lovage=Automator sex. Great song. " strangers on a train" is a good one also. Last night this guy Kelly told me that he's gonna open a bar in Cona, Hawaii and wants me to be his bartender. I gues he wants to build soon. I've never been to Hawaii....
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I need sunlight. I need city life. I need to get the fuck out of here. Looking for a job sucks. especially when you're carless in alaska. Keeping a job and doing well is easy. Its the getting it part that sucks. Oh well. Gotta do whatcha gotta do. I need Loot. Maybe I should sell my virginity on ebay. Well I better do something...
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Free at last. Free at last. Thank God All Mighty I'm free at last. I feel like making a major change in my life now. I have eliminated all most all of the stressfull factors in my life. Alot of those factors are people. Time for a clean start. Time to do something positive. Oh yes.

Yay! House arrest. Better than being in the halfway house. I can do many productive activities that I've been meaning to get done. And since its only till Sunday morning, I wont get sick of it. I think Im going to apply for some student loans to go to Portland. I want to learn a new craft in these few days. Just need to pick...
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I danced with a princess last night and she left her shoe. I wish I would have danced better. She deserves a Fred Astair. Im only hoping that she would come back and dance again. This time I wouldn't mess up. So on that note I regress and get ready for work. So... Thank you Princess Victoria for being such a flower.

Last night is a reminder of how I have allways lived regardless of how I try to change it. I was in a house full of lesbians and made great friends and they loved me. After that some guy trying to get some H drove us around paying for everything and I licked a c note off him. I ended up at a girls house...
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