January 5th, 2018
Part 4
After ten minutes of deciding on where to go for dinner, we finally decided on A WOK, the Chinese restaurant in the strip next to Acme. I had never been there, so it was something new, and it was better than driving to Highland Square for the other choices on your small list.
We got our food and retreated to my car.
“It’s chilly outside,” I said. “I should have worn more layers...”
“Want to get under the blanket with me?” you ask with a knowing smile.
That would put us right up against each other.
“I...” I didn’t know what to say. “I don’t want the blanket...to get into our tea...”
Smooth, Jaclyn.
We had a conversation where you were scared that I would run if I learned of certain things from your past.
“Honey,” I said, “the only person I care about is the one sitting next to me right now. Don’t let your past control the actions of your future.”
“I’ve killed six people.”
“I said don’t let your past control the actions of your future.”
You were happy with my words, and went back to eating.
Afterward, I looked over, and you were looking back. There was a warm smile on your face, a smile from deep within your heart.
I started to feel weird the longer our eyes were locked, but at the same time I didn’t want to look away. There was almost a peaceful warmth overtaking every inch of my body, and I felt myself wanting to fall into it.
“Awe...” you let out.
“What?” I managed.
“I just love this,” you replied. “I love all of this.”
I smile, “Me, too.”
We would then try to get your friend’s grounding stone out from under the passenger seat.
I got into the front seat while you remained in the back, and we tried to get what we thought to be the stone dislodged from where it fell.
All we succeeded in doing was having our hands touch.
I pulled away quickly and got into the backseat.
“How are we going to do this?” I wondered out loud.
It didn’t occur to me that your body was right up against mine until after I had asked the question.
It was like I was swimming in an ocean of love, and I didn’t care if I drowned or not.
There was nothing but silence.
Nothing except for us.
“I can always try tomorrow during the day...” I said, breaking the silence.
“Yeah...” you replied.
I rest my hand on the door handle.
“Plus, the people next to us are probably wondering what the hell is going on...” you suggest.
They probably were, but I didn’t care. Neither of us cared.
I opened the door and stepped out into the winter night.
We made our way to Acme so you could pick up some snacks and tea. While you were doing that, I tried one more time to dislodge the stone. Nothing was working. I needed sunlight.
You returned with your purchases, and showed me the different kinds of tea you had gotten.
“...and this is camomile tea!”
“Camomile!” I interrupt. “That’s the kind my coworker suggested I drink!”
You immediately start shoving bags of camomile tea into my face.
“Wait! You don’t have to give me any of this...”
“Yes, I do. Please take it.”
I relent and take your gift.
After a discussion about your family life, and eating your favorite cheese sticks, it was time to end our night.
I turned on the music on my iPhone as I started driving, and the song that came on was U2’s “You’re the Best Thing about Me.”
We butchered that thing all the way to your house, but it was fun.
I made sure that you had everything before leaving my car. The only thing that you would end up leaving was the stone, but I needed something to do for the rest of the weekend.
I walked you to your door.
With every step taken, I wanted to take you back out, dance in the moonlight, gaze up at the stars together as we stay warm under your blanket.
We faced each other, our eyes once again locked, the peaceful warmth from before, washing over my body shielding me from the cold.
A moment passed.
(Why couldn’t this moment last forever?)
We both leaned in...
(Why couldn’t this last?)
...wrapped our arms tightly around each other...
(Because...)
“I love you,” you said.
(...it was the only way.)
“I love you, too,” I replied.
We stayed like that, a moment frozen in time, a picture we would never take.
“Text me when you get home...”
“I will.”
Reluctantly, we parted.
You went inside your house.
I slowly walked down your driveway.
“Don’t leave,” a thought went through my mind.
“Turn around,” another thought.
“Go back to her,” said the thought that followed.
“Don’t go...” said the last in your voice...
I opened the car door, got in, backed out of your driveway...
...and drove into the night.