jburhite

Hmm, work work work. Where does my money go? I dont know.
I got 3 phone messages from a girl friend I havn't seen in a long time tonight. I had called her a bit ago, but this is the first I've heard from her in a while. I don't know the details, but I think she may be single now. Last I knew she was dating some dusche but hopefully her inviting me out, and what sounded like we would be alone, is a good sign. I used to have the biggest crush on this girl in high school, but we never dated. I am very weird in that I maintain crushes, more like total fixations, on girls for very very long periods of time without any sort of relationship development. I thought pretty much solely about this girl for nearly 3 years without ever dating once. I was, and am still to a degree, very shy, insecure, and low self esteem. Asking girls out scares the hell out of me. That and initiating anything physical nearly causese panic attacks in me. My heart races and I get all nervous and sweatty, but its not a good way. Back to my story though. The year after highschool her and another friend of mine got an apartment and we had some fun times then. I made out with her one time at her apartment, but thats as much as we've ever done. I still have a thing for her. She's cute, funny, smart, and very caring, a little spacy sometimes, but so am I. If she calls me back and it sounds like we could spend some time, I'm willing to drive the hour and fourty five minutes back home to see her, besides, laundry needs done and the washer and dryer at mom's is free. Anyhow, I'm gonna give my dad a phone call tomorrow. I promised I'd call more if he quit, although he kept saying "slow down" which sounds like he doesn't intend on totally quitting.