jasiri

what a fucked up night last night was...i'm still trying to find the rat bastard that drugged my drink two weeks ago. So, last night I actually found the one that I thought had done it. My plan was this; watch like a superstar fbi agent and catch him in the act of drugging some other girls drink. i made a few phone calls, and WHAMO...i've got several pissed off grrl friends ready to kick his ass....problem is...i believe in the whole fucking 'innocent until proven guilty' thang...which was really getting in the way of me just confronting him and ripping his premature balls off...so, anyway, i don't mean to be such a downer in this entry, it's just that i couldn't do anything...i talked to the security people and they showed general concern (ok, one of them did, the rest just acted like it was my fault for having left my drink...which was, by the way, right next to me on a windowsill the whole time i was dancing) and i had all my friends watching people's drinks (i know, i should be a fucking secret agent or something)...but what can any of us do??? it was impossible to keep track of him non-stop, and not be completely fucking obvious to the point that he freaks out and just leaves...which is fucking just fine with me, except who's to say that he won't just stop going to lola's room and hit some other dark venue to find his 'fuck' prey. but, i do feel enormously loved...one of my best friends (just think of her as ninja queen) spent the whole night bating him...she gave him enough hints on the dance floor to pass herself off as a single and horribly ALONE...and even put a cherry in her beer so she'd be able to track it...then, after he was all over her, and her drink ( he's so disgusting...i met other grrls last night, and they were completely disgusted by him as well, not even knowing about him before they knew that he was a potential suspect in a drug rape scenario) she not only asked him if he wanted a drink of HER beer...but took a sample of the beer she had to get tested...talk about your over- achiever!!! i love that grrl. but by the time i left i just felt completely hopeless...who knows who it actually was that put that drug in my drink....which means i quite easily could have been distracted by the wrong guy all night. FUCK! ...'and all i want to do is dance, dance, dance'.... funny, and yet serious. what freaks me out more is the fact of how frequently this is happening. when i told the door folks what happened...they were just like "aaahhh, man, another one! " it's like...what???? 'another one'... then they told me that it happens ALL THE TIME. how's that for ruining your peaceful drunken belligerency???? fuck...i'm in such a shitty mood this'morning'...i couldn't even go to the after hours party with my friends...just had to call a cab and cry like an idiot on the ride home. i fucking hate feeling powerless to injustice. and there's soooooooooo fucking many injustices happening in the world right now...it's fucking insane. but i will not even begin to go into that...jeez, i think my head would just explode. so, instead, i'll leave you lovely people to go in search of coffee solice, sunshine, and a new sweater...i'm perfoming at someone's birthday party tonight...and i have absolutly no drive to go and do that AT ALL. taking a long walk up mt. tabor sounds better....with a long soft scarf to wrap around me...kisses xoxoxo