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janegeraldine

Minneapolis, MN, Fairbanks, AK

Member Since 2007

Followers 106 Following 75

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Wednesday Sep 05, 2007

Sep 5, 2007
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I had the single greatest epiphany of my life tonight. I was in the midst of a bit of an emotional struggle...one that has been going on for the better part of this year and was keeping me from being my awesome self and was robbing me of my ability to just chill the fuck out and go with the natural flow of things. Then something I didn't want to happen happened and I had to stand back and think for a minute. See, I believe very strongly in Eastern philosophy and was glancing through some of my Taoist stuff hoping for something to enlighten me and four sentences popped out at me in amazing clarity. I won't bore anyone with quotes or anything, but I know now exactly what went wrong and how. I went through some really rough crap not too long ago that made me put a wall up even when I knew it was the wrong thing to do-I was not letting myself be at peace or to be one with my surroundings...Lao Tsu would be most disappointed in me. I sometimes lose the idea that the only real way to let things happen is to just LET them happen and that is when everything goes all wrong for me. It's funny 'cause I am always happy when I chill out and let the real me take over, but there are still times when the wall comes up and I lose sight of the fact that the natural way of things takes care of its own. My unwillingness to be at peace reflected in more ways than one, I think, and that's been really bothering me the last few days. Now it's time to let myself be open again-after all, sparks cannot fly through an emotional wall. Words can't say how much better I feel now that I have come to terms with myself so I won't even try. biggrin
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
tinyelvis:
Friends? Trust me, you wanna be friends with this one!
Sep 9, 2007
malkav11:
Well. I really, genuinely do not know if I'd be what you're looking for. (Hell, I don't really know what you're looking for.)

But I *am* single. And a cursory eyeballing of your profile suggests that we do at least have some things in common. (Tool. Tarantino. Many, many videogames. Possibly other things.)

So here's my proposal: we pick a mutually used IM service (I'd most recommend Google Talk, since that's what I can be relied on to have running). And if our IM conversations are at all interesting, then things could progress from there.

I suggest IMs mostly because I don't feel like SG works very well for holding conversations with one other person. I mean, I really like Necia and Zarth and several of the other people on my friends list, and somehow I hardly ever wind up talking specifically to them. A bit of interplay in a general thread, at most.

If you'd rather not, that's fine. I have confidence that sooner or later you will find that guy. I mean, there's over a million people in the metro area. Surely at least one of them's a decent, single guy that would dig you and vice versa.
Sep 9, 2007

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