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james_

United Kingdom

Member Since 2003

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Wednesday Jan 19, 2005

Jan 18, 2005
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I think I've finally made a decision.
I don't want to give up smoking pot, but I think I need to stop smoking it all through every day. Things are starting to get a bit heavy, particularly when I'm dropping off to sleep. I occasionally hear voices, and last night, I had something slightly frightning happen. Impossible to explain what it was, but it scared the shit out of me. So I'm cutting down to one at night. I've started smoking roll ups to compensate, which is vile and I hate it. This is good because it means I only have a couple a day. But bad because I gave up smoking the beginning of last year (I haven't bought a packet of fags for about 10 months - Oh camel lights, you are so sorely missed!)
The thing is, even though this has to end, I'll miss it. I have discovered so much about myself and about the world from smoking pot. It's helped my head no end, and for the first time in my life i actually feel normal. I hope I stay that way when I stop.
I think I've expressed many times how good the last six months has been for my soul.It was something I needed to do. and although most people disapprove, I have absolutely no regrets. So, I'm setting myself some rules.

Only one joint a night
No class A's when I'm not out or with someone, and only at weekends.
NO ALCOHOL (I've had this one a while, and stuck to it pretty well. I have the occasional baileys of a night, but that doesn't count!)

I'm going to go to the doctor, and see if I can get some night sedation, as well. to stop any further scariness that occurs.

I've caned it, my friends, and now it's time to take a break.

Wish me luck!
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
lorelei:
dude....i know how you feel... giving up alcohol is easy.. i go through long periods where i can't stand the idea of alcohol anyway.. but i smoke a LOT ... it does kind of normalize me as well. but i do need to cut back.
wow though... .voices? have you smoked that regularly for years and years?
Jan 20, 2005
rubyred:
you love your drugs dont you. i SO can relate, but yeah, when youre telling yourself it isnt cool, then listen. dont bother going cold turkey cause you'll fuck it. just ease off, do your best. you'll be sweet. but keep at yourself. thats what i do smile
Jan 20, 2005

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