jaimy

i just moved from los angeles to north central florida and it's very different. although i'm tripping out and freaking out and lonely, the centuries old moss laden oaks are riveting. the bugs are loud. i found spiders, guiltily kililed them by freezer and took them to entymologists who identified them as harmless. every moment is a bizarre adventure and i don't feel safe. i guess i'm so much more used to living in a building where two people have been murdered in less than a year,hearing drive-bys (with tons of neighbors murdered monthly it seems) and driving manically defensively and offensively. it's like my survival skills and personal reality have been subverted and the skills i've cultivated don't quite work. eg i can't wear make-up it's so hot and my charm and fashion only work, and to a limited degree, on the very small handful of gay men i've met. to continue, i worked at l.a. nightclubs for years and my good times with friends consisted of getting high and finding trouble. here, the people i've fallen in with-and they are good peole-play trivial pursuit, card games, charades, and pool games. i think maybe it's more fun here but it's just totally weird.