jadednerdgirl

I woke up at 4.45 in pain. my body feels like it is rejecting me. doesn't it know that I have to be on the road for 13+ hours today and that tuesdays and thursdays totally wipe me out and that I could use all the sleep I can. I even went to bed at 10 last night so I would actually feel like moving at 6 am. I am so jittery too. I hope that the jitteriness isn't from just jumping back on my medicine routine from being off it for a little while. usually I am forgetful every once and a while for a few days but I accidently just sropped taking it and it was one of those things that every night I keep putting it off about getting back on and to the point it was hey I have taken them in ages. I should be on them cause I know I will be stressed this semester with school and all. too much going on and when I get home there is too much going on here too. then I got the 'you haven't been doing much around here'. dad bitched that last night that he was doing dishes that he washed last night. wtf. I got home from school at 9.45, trying to get home in time that he could use MY car since one of theirs is in the shop. I ate while I watched 6' under on on demand then I went upstairs looked at a couple emails and went to bed. then I woke up in the morning took a shower and got ready then left for a doc appointment then I went straight to school even though I had awhile before class but it wasn't worth going home. I wish he would bitch at me only when it makes sense. I know he is doing more now than what he was. I know I am doing less. I would get up and get keith ready for school, take care of the birds and do dishes and sometimes sweep the first floor. but with my schedule I can't do that. I know everyone works full time and comes home but what am I suppose to do when I have days that I am gone from 8 til 9.30ish? and when I have a shorter day that I either at work or so worn out I cannot really move. It is so hard to stay awake driving. and I am going 7 days a week. at least they have 2 days of rest. they are not working and going to school. I wish I could do more. I feel bad that I am not. I am just in my first 2 weeks of school and I need to get my grove into things and doesn't help I got sick at the begining of ths semester.

tonight I am going to the AIGA kick off for the fall instead of sculpture... actually I am doing sculpture during my usual break though I work through it anyway. so I have to bring nice clothes along and makeup and the curling iron. not the first time I made myself over in those bathrooms. its just so much faster than going home and back out and I really don't have the time to plus I will be in clay and paint all day after I drudge through american lit.

I guess I will go shower .... maybe it will make me feel better



... hmm. that was one thing that was nice getting up early. I just came back upstairs after having a nice long conversation with my mom.
now aleve.... kick in so some of this pain goes away