jacquesdemolay

Well, I'm back in Israel and back at work. My trip to Spain was far too short but I still got what I needed from it. The reason I went was to see Juana, a girl I dated when I first came to Israel. I hadn't seen her in four years but I wasn't over her at all. I haven't been able to carry on a relationship with anyone else or stop thinking about her in those four years. I'd wanted to visit her any number of times before I finally did, but for one reason or another never did, I guess that really I was just afraid.

She's not from Spain or Israel, she was in both just to study, she's actually from Brazil. She told me a few weeks ago that she would be going home to Brazil soon in order to work for the Partido dos Trabalhadores in the upcoming elections; and she asked me if I would come visit while she was still relatively close. So I did, I wanted to see if there was still anything between us and if it would be worth pursuing this any further or if I could finally let her go and get on with my life. The three days I spent with her in Spain were probably the happiest of my life. She was every bit as amazing as I remembered her. What this means for the future is somewhat more difficult to say. The hope is that she'll be able to get a job in the US after the election (she's already gotten offers for a few US companies), and then I'll be able to meet her there. It'll probably have to be in DC, but hopefully there will be some choice of cities.

Being back here has really bummed me out though. I was feeling down about leaving Juana already and what I really needed to take the edge off that was the feeling of it being nice to be home, but it isn't. After just a few days of being away from Israelis and their appalling manners, it came as a huge shock to be back here and getting screamed at constantly for no reason. I'm hoping the feeling will pass soon and I'll be able to go back to a relatively normal life, but for now it's a real drag.