jacksalt

I am having a really difficult time focusing on work. I have had all week. While it is tempting to blame the pursuits I choose to do instead of my work (like browse SG and look at old photosets as well as search for cool people, or skip work to play my new PC game (which is really cool BTW) or read a book half the day, etc.) as "distractions", they are really just the filler, and the problem is the desire to SOMETHING ANYTHING else.
I like my work fine, it pays the bills, has its challenges, etc, as well as its dull moments just like all work. But i find myself practicing the fine art of avoidance a great deal- truthfully, not just work, but "must dos" at home and the like. As much as I like to read, the reading has become important just for the reading sake, rather than full immersion in the subject. I wonder why? Why so much escapism, so much of a desire to be not "present"? It has been getting worse all year.

It seems like as I get older, I shrink- not only do I not do so much of what i used to in the social line, it seems almost like I am not capable anymore, as if a "life cocoon" or somesuch has gradually shrunk around me. I find it harder and harder to break through, and not sure I care sometimes.

Well, anyway....