My husband doesnt think I am capable of doing anything on my own. That is why he doesnt think the idea of me starting any kind of business will work. He wants me to settle. He told me he wanted to be a race car driver. I never said, But if you fail Ill be in debt to my eyeballs. We will lose the house Its too risky Instead I said You can do whatever you put your mind to honey Ill support you all the way You would be a great driver!
I am nobody. I thought that someday I would get to be somebody. But even the one who is supposed to know me best, the one would is supposed to stick by my side no matter what even he knows. Youre better to just live life as you are. Nobody. I will always do the job I hate for a person who doesnt even know my name.
Invisible.
Nothing.
Nobody.
You could be a veterinarian I already work at a vet clinic. I hate it.
Invisible.
Nothing.
Nobody.
Just live life as you are. Nobody special. Nicks wife. Dont try to be someone you are not. But then, who am I? I can tell you right now this is not me. My own husband doesnt even know who I am. But then again, neither do I. Nobody does.
Invisible.
Nothing.
Nobody.
Its enough to make me wish I was never born. Or that I would just blow away with a strong breeze. He doesnt understand. To him a job is just about the money. Its just something one does to get by. Not me. What ever I do as a profession, is who I am. It will ultimately become the bulk of my life. As I lay on my deathbed and my life flashes before my eyes, it will be 90% of I see. I want it to be happy. I was to know what it feels like to be happy. He doesnt understand what that means.
Happy.
I dont know what it means either.
Happy.
What does it feel like?
Look like?
Taste like?
What is it like to be somebody? For people to know you (truly know you)? To know yourself?
Invisible.
Nothing.
Nobody.
I am nobody. I thought that someday I would get to be somebody. But even the one who is supposed to know me best, the one would is supposed to stick by my side no matter what even he knows. Youre better to just live life as you are. Nobody. I will always do the job I hate for a person who doesnt even know my name.
Invisible.
Nothing.
Nobody.
You could be a veterinarian I already work at a vet clinic. I hate it.
Invisible.
Nothing.
Nobody.
Just live life as you are. Nobody special. Nicks wife. Dont try to be someone you are not. But then, who am I? I can tell you right now this is not me. My own husband doesnt even know who I am. But then again, neither do I. Nobody does.
Invisible.
Nothing.
Nobody.
Its enough to make me wish I was never born. Or that I would just blow away with a strong breeze. He doesnt understand. To him a job is just about the money. Its just something one does to get by. Not me. What ever I do as a profession, is who I am. It will ultimately become the bulk of my life. As I lay on my deathbed and my life flashes before my eyes, it will be 90% of I see. I want it to be happy. I was to know what it feels like to be happy. He doesnt understand what that means.
Happy.
I dont know what it means either.
Happy.
What does it feel like?
Look like?
Taste like?
What is it like to be somebody? For people to know you (truly know you)? To know yourself?
Invisible.
Nothing.
Nobody.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
You know, the reality is, that we are all individuals becoming from the actions we choose. No matter how much you feel like a nobody, that is an action you CHOOSE to reinforce. Im not saying that you would consciously choose it, but somewhere along the rode, you have decided that believing in yourself as invisible, or a nobody, was a decision you still made, out of desperation, or out of subconscious defense mechanisms. but we all BELIEVE what we BELIEVE, and that is a CHOICE we make. its hard to swallow, but so is settling for anything less than your dreams. Id rather be alone, doing what I want, than to be with someone, doing a half as job at my relationship, as well as at my own life. ***shrugs*** I dunno... some people spend a whole lifetime complaining about how they cant find who they are, and that no one knows them. Some people spend that same lifetime understanding they are nothing more than the experiences they can have...and that they will become, through how they live their life, and that to know oneself, is a process, not a goal.