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j3nn

Behind the Orange Curtain

Member Since 2005

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Sunday Sep 17, 2006

Sep 17, 2006
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I had a friend decide last night that life was too hard and he took his own life. I have never even known someone personally to commit suicide until today and they feelings are much different than if someon died from being sick or old age or even an accident. My heart truly aches for him and the pain he must have been feeling to get himself to the place he was last night when he pulled the trigger. No one should have to hurt like that and this is just another example of the fucked up world we live in. Staying with a complete and total manipulating fucking BITCH for no other reason but his children. And look where it got him. There are so many Maybes and what if's I am feeling right now I just need to stop because the truth of the matter is that there is nothing anyone can do now. There is nothing I can do now but hope he is happier now.. That he no longer is feeling any of the pain he has been.

I really hope that if there IS such thing as heaven and hell that who ever decides where you get to go will really evaluate his life and his situation and not put him in a plce that is far worse than here on earth becuase he deserves some sort of happiness and I hope he is getting it where ever he is now... He was a great friend and an awesome father that until this day always put his children ahead of any and everything else including his own happiness. I guess he was just pushed to far. Who would have thought that a man who called suicide the cowards way would be the one to take his life in that manner? He knows what it does to loved ones! He experienced it once himself He had a friend take him life and he hurt along with his friends and family for years for the loss of this person. All I can think is that when the time came he was not thinking at all... All I can think is that he must have gone completely numb... I know I am babbling on here but I am just trying to deal with what has happened and I am hoping if I keep venting about it that maybe I will actually be albe to sleep tonight and get through tomorrow,... He was such a wonderful friend and I will miss him terribly!!!!!!!!!!!!!
VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
nikonphoto80:
I was just saying what I felt, I know how it is and I know how you need some one right now.

I know I'm right, the way that Hindus think that reincarnation works just makes so much since to me, but there are parts of it that I'm not sure about, just like any religion.
Sep 19, 2006
phraktyl:
Ummm... What happened to your MySpace?
Sep 22, 2006

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