j0bber

What I did on the night of July 4th was stay sober. Although that would have been difficult to determine from my actions, which started by getting into a 20-year-old zodiac and taking it out to the middle of the Charles, right up to the fireworks safety line.

Scott found the zodiac and another inflatable boat and it was determined that they didn't leak too badly. We had no oars, but he took apart an old futon frame and made something like a pair of oars using old plywood and duct tape. We got in the first boat and started rowing, towing the second boat behind us, full of people. Scott's oar broke first, but he managed to keep paddling somehow, and we made it out to the safety line, and tied to a buoy. The fireworks were awesome, their quality being enhanced by the fact that they were deployed directly above us.

Our excitement was briefly subdued by the boat taking up on more water, and we didn't have a bailer, but I cut off the bottoms of my jeans and we used those as rags to soak up the water and wring it out over the sides.

Finally, as we were leaving, the second oar broke, and we both had to paddle with what was left of the plywood. In the rush, we decided to squeeze between two large yachts, which were in the process of colliding, unbeknownst to us. We made it through the gap with about 3 seconds to spare. The boats thudded together about ten feet behind us.

Best... 4th... EVVVER.