ives

This weekend was further proof that I am not to be trusted in the kitchen.

On Saturday I came from the gym and I was starving! Of course, I was raised with no basic skills that would help me in life, like you know.....how to fucking feed myself haha.

With some help it started off easily enough, I was making chicken parmesan so I was cooking the pasta and getting the chicken ready. It was time for the sauce so I went to the fridge and took out a fresh bottle of sauce.

So I get the sauce and I couldnt open it. Im like trying to turn it and it wouldnt budge. I finally asked for help and before anyone came I decided to try once more. I try twisting the top off and the fucking thing goes flying out of my hands. I swear, it was slow motion.....it flew as if I threw it, no lie haha.

So it goes flying straight to the floor and within seconds the floor is covered in fucking thick sauce and glass. I kind of stood there with a a big "asshole" stamped across my forehead...

I go down to clean it up with towels and sure enough I slice my fucking hand open.

*T^T^^@%^#%^@%^&#$%@$*&(*^@)

Granted, it was a small cut but it started to bleed so i ran to the bathroom to clean my hand. After a good 10 mins of cleaning and stopping the bleeding I go back with my crippled hand to finish the rest of the food.

The up side is that the food was awesome