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itzjusme

SF Bay Area, MV, RWC, PV

Member Since 2004

Followers 61 Following 47

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Saturday Jun 05, 2004

Jun 5, 2004
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I'm so fucking sick of having weight problems. I feel like killing myself. When I feel like nobody wants me....when I feel like I am so ugly...I don't want to even try. I know that it doesn't matter what others think- it is what I think. I KNOW. But ya know what? It hurts to feel ignored. It hurts to feel like the world thinks I am disgusting. I am scared to go out everyday. I honestly hate it. I have been losing weight since I started taking thryroid meds but it is not fast enough for me... I feel like It will never get better. I will never look like the old me. I am trying to stay positive- but I feel that it is damn near impossible when I don't feel beautiful. FUCK- I can't be clear right now with my thoughts. I have had a fucking rollercoaster of a week. You don't have many friends when you are in this head. OR IN THIS NASTY BODY. WHY THE HELL AM I ON THIS SITE? I wonder that all the time...It just makes me feel worse and worse about myself. I work so hard and it seems like I will never be pretty. FUCK FUCK FUCK. I am not doing very well. YOU WANT A HAPPY ENTRY? fuck off. mad (sorry- i am not having a good day) oink
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
kosomot:
I feel the same way sometimes. Maybe not to the extent as you do, but i think alot of your feelings are do to the recent break up. Give it some time.

love kiss
Jun 5, 2004
iamthelizardking:
well, i don't know where i'll be living anymore, if that's any consolation.

pictures once i get my stuff in the mail.

cheer up, buck-o

thee's a ladybug on my computer. right now, as i type this.
Jun 5, 2004

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