So...I went to my psychiatrist today and he sent me to get my thyroid tested because I have had random weight gain despite the fact that i'm practically starving myself and i'm working out almost daily. My family has a history of the problem. I hope to god that's what it is because if not, I have no fucking clue what is wrong with me. It's ruining my social/emotional life. I will find out in like four days. He can then put me on thyroid stimulating hormones and maybe i'll get back to normal. Otherwise, i think i'm just cursed because i'm trying so hard to lose weight and it's not coming off. Sorry about all the serious entries lately. Things are just feeling bumpy. I think it's kinda funny that i go to suicidegirls.com because usually stuff like this (cute girls) makes me feel horrible about myself. SHIT....I need to fucking cheer the fuck up. 
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Good luck with your health issues. I know how shitty things can be when you don't know what's up with your own body. I've had some major problems in the last few years health-wise.
When my fiancee left me.. I was under so much stress. I was broken hearted in the most literal of ways. I had a minor heart attack.. from stress. Not a very cool thing to happen to a 20 year old (this was almost 2 years back)
The doctors thought I had some serious damage to my heart and I had wear heart monitors and what not for a while. I had to wait for days to find out what was wrong with my heart. It turns out it was just fairly weak and the stress kicked it's ass. The way they were talking, they were making it out that I had some major heart disease. They ended up apologizing for making assumptions. haha.
I know that doesn't seem like it's relevant.. I'm just saying I know how it is when you don't know whats wrong.
Things will look up in the end. Because, if you are at a point where you think things can't get any worse.. the only place to go is up with your life. Things will get better. Trust me.
What you said about cute girls making you feel horrible about yourself.. Well, from your profile pic, I can't imagine why that would be the case. You seem quite lovely. You actually remind me of a friend back home.. and in some weird way that is mildy comforting (which I admit is weird) You have the almost exact facial structure. Very weird.
Take care, ok.
Feel better.
i found your name from the SGcatholics group.