today was a good day. emphasis on was. on the upside of things, it was my first day at my new job and it felt so good to be at a "normal" place of employment again. even if that does mean that i have to wear a stupid uniform. i already have tons of useless coffee knowledge from a previous job (Starbucks comepetitor) so i'm fitting in well already i think.
on one of the training modules it goes over how to mop a floor. what? who in the world doesn't know how to mop a damn floor.
on the downside of things, more drama. bad drama. involving the usual parties. g.o.d. it doesn't stop.
i'm so tired. really very tired. all i want, more than anything, is for some normal and some stability to get applied to The Boy and my relationship. i love him. and he loves me. but if this relationship does not get more peaceful, it will sink faster than it can swim.
i'm too exhausted to deal with all this stuff. i just want to be with him, live with him, take care of him, love him. is that too much to fucking ask?
i actually talked to The Ex (his) a little tonight.... i fully expected her to be full of piss and vinegar (as my gramma would say), but she was very fair and actually gave good advice. i may have been frustrated with her, but i never believed she was all bad. somewhere in there was a plain old girl, just as frustrated by life as i can be. and i'm glad i got to see that side of her.
i honestly let go of my pettiness and fears associated with her. i hope she gets what she wants and needs and is happy. i don't wish her any ill will. but i also, in that, hope that she too will grant me the same respect. i want us to be at the very least cordial, i want us to be able to get along, for her sake, mine, Jason's and their daughter. if she wishes to talk badly of me, fine, but i'm letting go of my anger towards it.
i don't know when The Boy will be home tonight. i'm sure he will be very drunk. i don't want to talk about It. i don't really want to talk to him. i want to be left alone in my own thoughts. i don't think that's a bad thing.... i'm not angry, just sad and frustrated and unsure.
on one of the training modules it goes over how to mop a floor. what? who in the world doesn't know how to mop a damn floor.
on the downside of things, more drama. bad drama. involving the usual parties. g.o.d. it doesn't stop.
i'm so tired. really very tired. all i want, more than anything, is for some normal and some stability to get applied to The Boy and my relationship. i love him. and he loves me. but if this relationship does not get more peaceful, it will sink faster than it can swim.
i'm too exhausted to deal with all this stuff. i just want to be with him, live with him, take care of him, love him. is that too much to fucking ask?
i actually talked to The Ex (his) a little tonight.... i fully expected her to be full of piss and vinegar (as my gramma would say), but she was very fair and actually gave good advice. i may have been frustrated with her, but i never believed she was all bad. somewhere in there was a plain old girl, just as frustrated by life as i can be. and i'm glad i got to see that side of her.
i honestly let go of my pettiness and fears associated with her. i hope she gets what she wants and needs and is happy. i don't wish her any ill will. but i also, in that, hope that she too will grant me the same respect. i want us to be at the very least cordial, i want us to be able to get along, for her sake, mine, Jason's and their daughter. if she wishes to talk badly of me, fine, but i'm letting go of my anger towards it.
i don't know when The Boy will be home tonight. i'm sure he will be very drunk. i don't want to talk about It. i don't really want to talk to him. i want to be left alone in my own thoughts. i don't think that's a bad thing.... i'm not angry, just sad and frustrated and unsure.
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nope. not too much to ask. not at all. Hopefully the drama will start to simmer down now...leaving only non-dramay goodness.
I want to be very drunk. however...that would mean getting very little sleep before going to work. I like my sleep a little too much. maybe on the weekend. that sounds like a much better game plan for me.
I actually know a few people that lack those skills...do you have to take a mopping test? that would be funny. ha. see? funny.
mark says: smile. like this guy ---->