*WARNING: DO NOT READ THIS UNLESS YOU WANT TO HEAR ME COMPLAIN LIKE THE DRUNKEN FOOL THAT I AM*
so i think i might be becoming an alcoholic. i dont think that there was a night this week that i havent opened up my bottle of captain morgan private stock and gotten at least buzzed. but lately i cant stop thinking about past relationships and it's driving me nuts. i just finished looking at my fuck-ass first boyfriend's livejournal. but all that did was get me really pissed off.although i'm kind of glad that i read it because it remided me of what a fucking asshole he is and that i didnt really like the person i became when i was with him. he's home from army bootcamp until jan. 3rd. he's lucky that i dont live near him anymore or i'd be tempted to commit more acts of sabotage. i almost feel bad for saying this, but i wish nothing but pain and misery for him in the rest of his days.
one more week until i start college. hopefully i can meet a man there that will preoccupy my mind with good thoughts. i'm generally too much of a happy person to have all of these thoughts of hate in my head.
i guess part of all of this is the fucking holidays. it's strange.... i've always started going out with boys right before x-mas. this was the first x-mas in 3 years that i didnt have a boyfriend. i'm sure that's contributing to my foul mood.
i got into a discussion at work today with a co-worker about the last time that we had sex. it's been since september for him. and i hadnt realized it until tonight, that it's been since february for me. almost a whole fucking year!i'm 21. i'm in my prime. i should be out there fucking anything that walks. and if i didnt have to work at 9 in the fucking morning on new year's day i'd probably be going to a frat party with one of the finest boys i've seen in a long time and banging his 18 year old brains out. *sigh* such is life i guess. maybe i'll become a nun before i get carpal tunnel in my wrist.
i'm sorry for complaining, but all i have in me pain, heartache, and lonliness.
so i think i might be becoming an alcoholic. i dont think that there was a night this week that i havent opened up my bottle of captain morgan private stock and gotten at least buzzed. but lately i cant stop thinking about past relationships and it's driving me nuts. i just finished looking at my fuck-ass first boyfriend's livejournal. but all that did was get me really pissed off.although i'm kind of glad that i read it because it remided me of what a fucking asshole he is and that i didnt really like the person i became when i was with him. he's home from army bootcamp until jan. 3rd. he's lucky that i dont live near him anymore or i'd be tempted to commit more acts of sabotage. i almost feel bad for saying this, but i wish nothing but pain and misery for him in the rest of his days.
one more week until i start college. hopefully i can meet a man there that will preoccupy my mind with good thoughts. i'm generally too much of a happy person to have all of these thoughts of hate in my head.
i guess part of all of this is the fucking holidays. it's strange.... i've always started going out with boys right before x-mas. this was the first x-mas in 3 years that i didnt have a boyfriend. i'm sure that's contributing to my foul mood.
i got into a discussion at work today with a co-worker about the last time that we had sex. it's been since september for him. and i hadnt realized it until tonight, that it's been since february for me. almost a whole fucking year!i'm 21. i'm in my prime. i should be out there fucking anything that walks. and if i didnt have to work at 9 in the fucking morning on new year's day i'd probably be going to a frat party with one of the finest boys i've seen in a long time and banging his 18 year old brains out. *sigh* such is life i guess. maybe i'll become a nun before i get carpal tunnel in my wrist.
i'm sorry for complaining, but all i have in me pain, heartache, and lonliness.
twitch008:
Aww, nothing wrong with being an alcoholic. As long as you're not an angry drunk or let it control you're life. It's like any other addiction, you have to manage it or it will control you. As for not having enough sex...well, I'm damaged goods but I'd always be willing to provide. 
I always kinda wondered what it'd be like to have sex with another leo.
I always kinda wondered what it'd be like to have sex with another leo. 
joeythenifty:
i'll offer to have sex with you too. but only if it'll make you feel better