itsabecky

sometimes when i'm driving home late at night i think about the strangest things. some of them just puzzling and others sometimes morbid. i saw the remains of what i presume was a dear splashed all over the highway and wondered what it was thinking seconds before the smack. and somehow that led me to how i would dispose of a body if i were to ever kill someone. then i started thinking about the mormons and polygamyand if all of the man's wives are married to eachother as well. did the puritans think that the indians were witches? why does the number 666 keep popping up in my life? or is it only popping up becuase i'm looking out for it? will it ever stop popping up? man, sometimes my head is just full of racing thoughts. almost to the point where i wonder if i'm crazy. sometimes it sounds as though i have a whole lot of people all talking about something different inside my brain. like when you're at a party with a whole lot of people and you're just catching little snippets of conversations from every angle. then your head starts to spin a little but from the information overload.

reading the above really makes me seem as though i'm crazy.

my last day at work was a little rough at first. rachel had a beautiful boquet of pink carnations delivered and i started bawling my eyes out. then when i started to regain composure i saw the card and that got me going again. 15 minutes later hammie came in with another boquet of flowers and an even more touching card. and of course i lost it again. in fact, seeing me cry made him cry too which only made me cry more when i saw that. i was a vicious, teary circle. i honestly cant remember the last time i ried before today. this past summer was real shitty and i had to put up an emotional wall. i guess it finally came down today. but it took a lot out of me. all of this on top of having strep throat. i cant wait to just lay in bed and watch movies all day tomorrow.

so on that note... sweet well all of you (especially Lixx )