Ok i need a challenge.
Give me a topic, any topic.
Keep it relatively possible to write about and i shall try to write some comedy about it.
SkyeRocket gave the topic of sharks...
Sharks. Nature's most fearsome predator. They are over 420 million years old, which in cat years is an even more astounding figure. Being apex predators, they lie at the top of the food chain. Much like the bullies you used to know at school. Like those bullies at school, sharks are beset with many emotional problems; their tendency to lash out, react angrily to stressful situations and eat other fish in their habitat makes it difficult to make friends, never mind form relationships. This lack of connection over time has led to them evolving their faces into a natural grimace. Their cold dead eyes are a result of sitting too close to the TV, watching 'Robson Green's Extreme Fishing' (the one where the former star of soldier soldier says "fuck" a lot while on a boat) the constant scenes of fishy demise is like 'total wipeout' to them. The best way to repel a shark attack is to punch them on the nose. But if you are the type of person willing to attempt to punch a shark in the nose you deserve any sea battle you find yourself in.
TinklyGeisha gave the topic of Kebabs...
Kebabs.
Kebabs.
Keeebabs. A national dish for many countries. Mostly countries where they will eat fucking ANYTHING. The king of kebabs is the donner kebab, made from lamb parts, lard and hope. Its the staple dish of the drunken decision, most kebabs are eaten in the early morning after getting pissed up, as a kind of ceremony. The continuation of the ceremony is to eat half the kebab then either hurl it at someone who you dislike or leave it at a bus stop.
An average kebab contains 4567 calories which is the same as consuming six bin bags of sushi with a side order of eggs. Most people forego the amount of calories involved in the kebab because of the self-loathing high they give the consumer. Much like a cigarette that tells you that you should get that cough checked out.
Give me a topic, any topic.
Keep it relatively possible to write about and i shall try to write some comedy about it.
SkyeRocket gave the topic of sharks...
Sharks. Nature's most fearsome predator. They are over 420 million years old, which in cat years is an even more astounding figure. Being apex predators, they lie at the top of the food chain. Much like the bullies you used to know at school. Like those bullies at school, sharks are beset with many emotional problems; their tendency to lash out, react angrily to stressful situations and eat other fish in their habitat makes it difficult to make friends, never mind form relationships. This lack of connection over time has led to them evolving their faces into a natural grimace. Their cold dead eyes are a result of sitting too close to the TV, watching 'Robson Green's Extreme Fishing' (the one where the former star of soldier soldier says "fuck" a lot while on a boat) the constant scenes of fishy demise is like 'total wipeout' to them. The best way to repel a shark attack is to punch them on the nose. But if you are the type of person willing to attempt to punch a shark in the nose you deserve any sea battle you find yourself in.
TinklyGeisha gave the topic of Kebabs...
Kebabs.
Kebabs.
Keeebabs. A national dish for many countries. Mostly countries where they will eat fucking ANYTHING. The king of kebabs is the donner kebab, made from lamb parts, lard and hope. Its the staple dish of the drunken decision, most kebabs are eaten in the early morning after getting pissed up, as a kind of ceremony. The continuation of the ceremony is to eat half the kebab then either hurl it at someone who you dislike or leave it at a bus stop.
An average kebab contains 4567 calories which is the same as consuming six bin bags of sushi with a side order of eggs. Most people forego the amount of calories involved in the kebab because of the self-loathing high they give the consumer. Much like a cigarette that tells you that you should get that cough checked out.
VIEW 9 of 9 COMMENTS
tinkly:
I will keep my fingers and toes crossed for you and it 
skyerocket:
I was scared to make a list because I knew it was 99% negatives. So I kept myself busy, went ahead and fuckin' did it anyway and it was blates worth it
Thanks for the idea though. I was just too much of a wuss to do it 
lol
Thanks for the idea though. I was just too much of a wuss to do it lol