I think a lot of what occurred that morning a few days ago will always stay in my head. There were millions of words flowing through my mind and all of them seemed correct and as though they were flowing through me from some unseen well of wisdom. I felt like my head was tuned to a different frequency, that I had found that perspective that I had been seeking. I realized that I had been missing so much in my connection with the universe and began to visualize my place in the world as just a tiny spike of energy, in a globular mass of the earth and all its living (and dead) things. I literally imagined the world as a large blue ball with small points coming out of it all over, representing trees and mountains and people and animals, but all the same and infinitely connected. Everything that wasn't gorgeous was funny, and everything that was funny was beautiful because it was a sign of life. I lay out on the grass, allowing a bee to buzz way too close to my ear without budging, convinced that he understood I wasn't trying to invade his turf; I was only visiting. My arms began to grow numb while holding my head up but it only felt like they were blending with the earth beneath me. I watched a tree in the distance, shimmering in the morning sun, convinced it was an aspen tree. I realized later that it wasn't an aspen at all, it's just that its leaves were shimmering to such an extent I was sure they were little discs of light. I was just so glad for every moment I've been alive and awake and aware and happy... I put away a lot of those negative energies I had been clinging to for... well... I don't really know why, but I know I had been doing it. I am grateful for everyone I know and everything I've experienced and I hope to keep that up for as long as I live... I was suddenly very in tune with the sickness of the world as well, and realized we all need to shut up and listen to the messages nature is constantly trying to convey to us.
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