Dani, I haven't said much about her mainly because well, there isn't much to say after one says good bye and you try to settle yourself into the role of just friends. She's been in Italy and I've been here. I've had other things on my mind, like school, that has kept me distracted. But today she kind of jumped to the front again.
She's staying in a small village while her husband works (prepping and performing in the opera Madama Butterfly), but she's lucky enough to have a net cafe thing near her so she's been able to come online and e-mail me, and even occasionally chat with me over MSN. Well, she was a bit down today and got all cheered up when she saw I'd written her a letter and was still on to talk, so I asked her what was up, if she wanted to talk about it.
She talked.
Her husband is a recovering alcoholic, this I knew. But she's told me now, since they got married, of several times he's gotten drunk, and he's gotten mean. Arguments. Yelling at each other, having to stop him from driving places. Well apparently that's part of why he had to stop drinking, because she wasn't having the meanness. Because when he gets drunk he's mean apparently (there was the whole almost breaking her finger incident by slamming it in a drawer when he was drunk), and this last time she told me about was particularly nasty.
They were to go to Florence. Which I hear is way awesome and pretty. But the night before he got way drunk, they argued, went home and he just didn't understand why the beginning of their romantic weekend was here and she just wasn't in the mood. So he kind of forced her, and she gave in and went along with it, but she told me he was really really rough and she was pretty scared. She swears he didn't hurt her though. But after he was done she packed her stuff and was going to come home. She was in a panic, having a bit of a meltdown, and some friends they had in the area found her and calmed her down, convinced her not to leave. In the meantime he'd woken up, found her not there, and headed back to the bar, where he was burning through their cash as fast as he could. So her weekend ended with her dragging him home again, him passing out, and them not having enough money to go to Florence.
I admit, I was kind of a bit irate about the whole forcing of sex thing. I joke about it a lot, but seriously, not cool. I felt better when Lindsay got as upset as I did when I told her. And I just .. I just know with how he's going, his drinking and refusal to change, and in fact becoming this person he was once upon a time all over again, I just know he's going to hurt her. I wish I could save her.
That's part of what's wrong with me of course, too damn nice for my own good. I want to be able to take on everyone's woes and ills myself because I want anyone I know around me to be happy and enjoy life. Lindsay told me to get my ass to Italy and go rescue her. I don't have a plane, or the money for a ticket, otherwise I might already have been on the way. Maybe I could even get a big white horse. She's always told me she wants to be saved by a knight on a horse.
My mind reels, my heart aches. I never ask for things like this for myself. I hate being selfish. But at times I just sit and curse and fret. I need a hug. Desperately. And money for a plane ticket ....
-JC
She's staying in a small village while her husband works (prepping and performing in the opera Madama Butterfly), but she's lucky enough to have a net cafe thing near her so she's been able to come online and e-mail me, and even occasionally chat with me over MSN. Well, she was a bit down today and got all cheered up when she saw I'd written her a letter and was still on to talk, so I asked her what was up, if she wanted to talk about it.
She talked.
Her husband is a recovering alcoholic, this I knew. But she's told me now, since they got married, of several times he's gotten drunk, and he's gotten mean. Arguments. Yelling at each other, having to stop him from driving places. Well apparently that's part of why he had to stop drinking, because she wasn't having the meanness. Because when he gets drunk he's mean apparently (there was the whole almost breaking her finger incident by slamming it in a drawer when he was drunk), and this last time she told me about was particularly nasty.
They were to go to Florence. Which I hear is way awesome and pretty. But the night before he got way drunk, they argued, went home and he just didn't understand why the beginning of their romantic weekend was here and she just wasn't in the mood. So he kind of forced her, and she gave in and went along with it, but she told me he was really really rough and she was pretty scared. She swears he didn't hurt her though. But after he was done she packed her stuff and was going to come home. She was in a panic, having a bit of a meltdown, and some friends they had in the area found her and calmed her down, convinced her not to leave. In the meantime he'd woken up, found her not there, and headed back to the bar, where he was burning through their cash as fast as he could. So her weekend ended with her dragging him home again, him passing out, and them not having enough money to go to Florence.
I admit, I was kind of a bit irate about the whole forcing of sex thing. I joke about it a lot, but seriously, not cool. I felt better when Lindsay got as upset as I did when I told her. And I just .. I just know with how he's going, his drinking and refusal to change, and in fact becoming this person he was once upon a time all over again, I just know he's going to hurt her. I wish I could save her.
That's part of what's wrong with me of course, too damn nice for my own good. I want to be able to take on everyone's woes and ills myself because I want anyone I know around me to be happy and enjoy life. Lindsay told me to get my ass to Italy and go rescue her. I don't have a plane, or the money for a ticket, otherwise I might already have been on the way. Maybe I could even get a big white horse. She's always told me she wants to be saved by a knight on a horse.
My mind reels, my heart aches. I never ask for things like this for myself. I hate being selfish. But at times I just sit and curse and fret. I need a hug. Desperately. And money for a plane ticket ....
-JC
BUT-
*hugegiantmassiveHUGS*
Keep doing what you are doing. And good luck.