Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

ironmog

Always be Visalia, CA

Member Since 2007

Followers 30 Following 43

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Saturday Jul 11, 2009

Jul 11, 2009
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
There are times when even my condemnable rational mind sheds its iron hard outer shell and rolls in the mud and slop of what ifs, if onlys, and maybes. These are times when I open and flow creatively. They also tend to follow swiftly behind my lows. And they are joined by lack of sleep. I simply cannot sleep of late. I am up until wee hours of the morning, then I am awake hours before work, the amount of time in between spent in bed is perilously brief.

I muse on things. I imagine and flow, letting my addled mind travel to locales not often visited, and thoughts like these are the result. I see her, I want to go to her, touch her, kiss her, let her know I'll always be here. She knows these things, like an instinctual understanding, it is as if on some primal level we communicate and mix perfectly. I stop and I know, just KNOW how or why. I know what will happen next. I understand it all. I accept all, not asking or needing more.

I think my flow has drifted away from me. The smell is still with me. I sense myself adrift, I seek something, I search for it, grasp. There! Reaching!

And nothing. I flow on.

-JC
nobodyhere:
It does seem a lot like that. An endless cycle of drifting, vain attempts to grab onto something positive, the inevitable what ifs and maybes and finally the realisation that she and i are drifting in opposite directions.
Is it any wonder we are struggling to sleep these days?
Hopefully school will be the positive you need. if you can enjoy that and everyday life again unlike in your previous job, then hopefully it will lay the groundwork for more good things to follow.
Jul 11, 2009

More Blogs

  • 09.15.08
    0

    Monday Sep 15, 2008

    Read More
  • 09.03.08
    0

    Wednesday Sep 03, 2008

    I hate not having anyone to talk to. Everything just keeps piling up…
  • 08.20.08
    0

    Wednesday Aug 20, 2008

    My youngest sister needs to have birthdays more often so I have an ex…
  • 08.11.08
    0

    Tuesday Aug 12, 2008

    I went ahead and saw Pineapple Express last Saturday. Hilarious. I …
  • 08.03.08
    2

    Sunday Aug 03, 2008

    Read More
  • 07.29.08
    3

    Tuesday Jul 29, 2008

    Read More
  • 07.17.08
    0

    Thursday Jul 17, 2008

    Ten hours until Friday! Then comes the day off, then the awesome Dar…
  • 07.10.08
    0

    Thursday Jul 10, 2008

    Boo-ya-ka-sha! Hellboy 2 this weekend and then Dark Knight NEXT we…
  • 07.08.08
    0

    Tuesday Jul 08, 2008

    Alright, we'll call that weekend a winner. Box it up, lets go. Frid…
  • 06.28.08
    1

    Saturday Jun 28, 2008

    Some of you may know, some may not. But I recently had my fight with…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
11
months
16
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,608 SuicideGirls
  • 1,113,421 followers
  • 14,961,915 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,496,423 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo