Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

irishsbuffy

Vista, CA

Member Since 2004

Followers 3 Following 5

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Sunday Oct 24, 2004

Oct 24, 2004
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
Since I am sure it will be out as public knowledge soon enough, lets just say people like to talk, I have decided to come out and be real honest with you my friends and who ever should read this journal.

I am human. I have made some bad choices. My daughters live their biolgical father not by my choice. I have said this many times before. What many dont know it is because he threaten that he would expose my past. 3 weeks after my dad died I had an emotional breakdown and tried to kill myself. Am I proud of this? HELL NO! It was the most selfish thing I ever did. I am proud that I got help.

I am getting help again. I have anxiety and panic attacks. I have been so sick that I have gone to the bathroom at work and prayed that it would pass before someone came in the room. It happen at a party. I had to leave because even though it had passed, I was still shaking so much that I was sure that another one was coming on. Many of my friends dont know about this. They know that I have had other health problems but not this. Why? Because I dont want people to think less of me or think I am crazy. The truth is I am a survivor.

You can think of the shittiest things that can happen and it may have happen to me. I made A LOT of stupid choices in life. Wanting attention, I listen to the wrong people. People like my mother. Even though I say that I am breaking the cycle with her, I have to break the cycle of people like her.

So, maybe I am not Mary Poppins and yes, I screw up and do things that are wrong and hurt people. I am thankful for those who open their hearts. I can't gurantee that I wont screw up again. But I will try not too.

IB

I was born two months to early
the doctor gave me thirty days
But I must've had my mama's will
And Gods amazing grace

I guess I'll keep on livin
Even if this loves to die for
Cause your bags are packed and I aint cryin
Youre walking out and Im not trying
To change your mind cause I was born to be

Chorus:
The baby girl without a chance
A victim of circumstance
The one who oughta give up,but shes just
too hard headed!
A single mom who works two jobs
Who loves her kids and never stops
With gentle hands and a heart of a fighter
Im a survivor
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
prettygirl66:
we all make bad choices but the only way to move foward in life is to learn from them. don't be too hard on yourself. everyone screws up and hurts people they love. i think it takes a strong person to admit they were wrong. not a lot of people can do that. if anyone would think less of you or think you're crazy for what you may have done or been through in your past, then maybe you should rethink the value of that friendship. i know there are things in my past that i am not proud of but the people who really genuinely care for me have never made me feel badly about them. afterall, isn't accepting everything about a person what love is all about?

cheer up sweetie

smile kiss
Oct 24, 2004
prettygirl66:
oh, and i did get that cuddle i needed wink

[Edited on Oct 25, 2004 2:32AM]
Oct 24, 2004

More Blogs

  • 01.04.05
    1

    Wednesday Jan 05, 2005

    Read More
  • 01.03.05
    2

    Tuesday Jan 04, 2005

    Read More
  • 01.03.05
    0

    Monday Jan 03, 2005

    I have been thinking about my mom today. I am sad for her. She has …
  • 01.03.05
    0

    Monday Jan 03, 2005

    Happy... I never thought I could feel this happy. More cold meds…
  • 01.01.05
    3

    Sunday Jan 02, 2005

    New Year and New Begining. I have only positive enrgy around me. I …
  • 12.31.04
    1

    Saturday Jan 01, 2005

    We just got home the most awesome NYE party. What makes it even bett…
  • 12.30.04
    0

    Friday Dec 31, 2004

    Happy New Year! We are going to a party and I am going to be stayi…
  • 12.30.04
    3

    Thursday Dec 30, 2004

    Mean people suck. My husband, my beloved, has been married bef…
  • 12.29.04
    2

    Wednesday Dec 29, 2004

    Guess what? Irish wants me to stay for another three months or more.…
  • 12.29.04
    0

    Wednesday Dec 29, 2004

    Do you ever see something happening and you want to say "Warning! War…

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
9
months
8
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,593 SuicideGirls
  • 1,120,514 followers
  • 14,920,612 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,392,861 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo