hey all,
Just submitted this to a local litmag for publication.
thought I'd throw it up for kicks.
Just submitted this to a local litmag for publication.
thought I'd throw it up for kicks.
SPOILERS! (Click to view)
Cast Tomsy:
Tomsy A poet
Addison A playwright
Setting: A student accommodation flat near city centre, Cork City.
Two men sit on a couch with nothing to do. They decide to write a play.
ADDISON: I once wrote a play about nothing. That is not to say that there was no content to the play, but the play was literally about nothing, you see.
Tomsy: How interesting.
(Beat)
Yknow, there is nothing right there.
ADDISON: Where?
TOMSY: there, (Points)
ADDISON: I dont get it.
TOMSY: Right there (Indicates Voraciously). Dont you see it?
ADDISON: I dont see anything
TOMSY: Right, because anything isnt there. Theres nothing.
ADDISON: Where?
TOMSY: Right there.
ADDISON: Tomsy, thats the wall.
TOMSY: I know (Frustrated) where there is
ADDISON: Not a damn thing!
TOMSY: Exactly!
ADDISON: I dont get it. I see nothing.
TOMSY: Thats what Im trying to tell you.
ADDISON: What?
(A Beat)
TOMSY: A What?
ADDISON: I think I heard a beat
TOMSY: A What?
ADDISON: Like, a beat. Like this:
(A Beat)
TOMSY: I dont hear anything
ADDISON: I know
TOMSY: What?
ADDISON: You know. A beat.
TOMSY: Im not fucking Kerouac, Addison.
ADDISON: No no no. I mean that was a beat.
TOMSY: I wasnt aware this was a competition.
(beat)
ADDISON: No, like that. A dramatic expression of time.
TOMSY: (expressing dramatically) ITS TEN TO SEVEN!!!
ADDISON: Uhhh, I mean an expression of dramatic time. Like so
(be
TOMSY: (interrupting the beat) I dont get it.
ADDISON: AHHH! You ruined it.
TOMSY: What?
ADDISON: Nothing
TOMSY: No, nothing is right there (indicates)
ADDISON: No, Tomsy, for the last time there isnt anything there.
TOMSY: Right, nothing is there.
ADDISON: Im confused. Where is everything?
TOMSY: Everything is in the shop.
(beat)
TOMSY: Wait, what was that?
ADDISON: (exhausted) A beat. An expression of dramatic time.
TOMSY: You live in a time of dramatic expression.
ADDISON: Youre mom lives in a time of dramatic expression.
TOMSY: Your
ADDISON: Huh?
TOMSY: Your mom lives in a time, dot dot dot not You are motherdot dot dot
ADDISON: How did you know? I mean
TOMSY: Im watching you type, dumbass.
ADDISON: Knock it off.
(Beat)
TOMSY: there it is again. Like nothing, but something.
ADDISON: No. I have something in my room.
TOMSY: Why?
ADDISON: Huh?
TOMSY: Thats sick, Addison.
ADDISON: Whats sick?
TOMSY: Is he?
ADDISON: What?
TOMSY: I thought we were talking about something.
ADDISON: You said that is sick.
TOMSY: No no no. That is at the football match. You said What is sick?.
ADDISON: Oh. right. At least I didnt lose everything.
TOMSY: I told you! Everything is at the shop.
ADDISON: Well now we dont have anything.
TOMSY: I know, but weve got nothing right there.
ADDISON: My point exactly! How are we going to watch the match if we dont have anything?
(beat)
TOMSY/ADDISON: (simultaneously)Oh, not again!/Im fucking bored.
TOMSY: (shakes head) Jesus, we should right a play about this.
Cast Tomsy:
Tomsy A poet
Addison A playwright
Setting: A student accommodation flat near city centre, Cork City.
Two men sit on a couch with nothing to do. They decide to write a play.
ADDISON: I once wrote a play about nothing. That is not to say that there was no content to the play, but the play was literally about nothing, you see.
Tomsy: How interesting.
(Beat)
Yknow, there is nothing right there.
ADDISON: Where?
TOMSY: there, (Points)
ADDISON: I dont get it.
TOMSY: Right there (Indicates Voraciously). Dont you see it?
ADDISON: I dont see anything
TOMSY: Right, because anything isnt there. Theres nothing.
ADDISON: Where?
TOMSY: Right there.
ADDISON: Tomsy, thats the wall.
TOMSY: I know (Frustrated) where there is
ADDISON: Not a damn thing!
TOMSY: Exactly!
ADDISON: I dont get it. I see nothing.
TOMSY: Thats what Im trying to tell you.
ADDISON: What?
(A Beat)
TOMSY: A What?
ADDISON: I think I heard a beat
TOMSY: A What?
ADDISON: Like, a beat. Like this:
(A Beat)
TOMSY: I dont hear anything
ADDISON: I know
TOMSY: What?
ADDISON: You know. A beat.
TOMSY: Im not fucking Kerouac, Addison.
ADDISON: No no no. I mean that was a beat.
TOMSY: I wasnt aware this was a competition.
(beat)
ADDISON: No, like that. A dramatic expression of time.
TOMSY: (expressing dramatically) ITS TEN TO SEVEN!!!
ADDISON: Uhhh, I mean an expression of dramatic time. Like so
(be
TOMSY: (interrupting the beat) I dont get it.
ADDISON: AHHH! You ruined it.
TOMSY: What?
ADDISON: Nothing
TOMSY: No, nothing is right there (indicates)
ADDISON: No, Tomsy, for the last time there isnt anything there.
TOMSY: Right, nothing is there.
ADDISON: Im confused. Where is everything?
TOMSY: Everything is in the shop.
(beat)
TOMSY: Wait, what was that?
ADDISON: (exhausted) A beat. An expression of dramatic time.
TOMSY: You live in a time of dramatic expression.
ADDISON: Youre mom lives in a time of dramatic expression.
TOMSY: Your
ADDISON: Huh?
TOMSY: Your mom lives in a time, dot dot dot not You are motherdot dot dot
ADDISON: How did you know? I mean
TOMSY: Im watching you type, dumbass.
ADDISON: Knock it off.
(Beat)
TOMSY: there it is again. Like nothing, but something.
ADDISON: No. I have something in my room.
TOMSY: Why?
ADDISON: Huh?
TOMSY: Thats sick, Addison.
ADDISON: Whats sick?
TOMSY: Is he?
ADDISON: What?
TOMSY: I thought we were talking about something.
ADDISON: You said that is sick.
TOMSY: No no no. That is at the football match. You said What is sick?.
ADDISON: Oh. right. At least I didnt lose everything.
TOMSY: I told you! Everything is at the shop.
ADDISON: Well now we dont have anything.
TOMSY: I know, but weve got nothing right there.
ADDISON: My point exactly! How are we going to watch the match if we dont have anything?
(beat)
TOMSY/ADDISON: (simultaneously)Oh, not again!/Im fucking bored.
TOMSY: (shakes head) Jesus, we should right a play about this.