one thing i never want to deal with is discovering im losing my youth. unfortunatly at 21, i already seem to be. i know its going to happen, but why do i need the apparent, the obvious shown to me trough the mirror everytime i glance? this is how it works for all you beautiful people. you look in the mirror, and see the beautiful person on the otherside. i look in the mirror and it reminds me im not so great. i just tend to forget the imperfections until im staring back at myself. to make light of the subject, cats dont have to deal with male pattern baldness, WHY THE HELL SHOULD I EVER HAVE TOO! 
im just in a really blah mood, and i wish i could rid myself of it. right now i wish i could put a bullet in every face of every person whos ever done me wrong uttering the words "i blame you for my problem, not myself, selfish i know, but so is the world" though i dont believe that would come out quite as quickly as the bullet that comes out of its casing and directly into your face. so, the only words leaving my mouth - "yeah, well..." unless i was the scatman. ;D ive noticed im so completely unable to love the people i care for the most. with every coming experience i gain in life, i seem to lose just alittle bit more of myself, the person i once saw myself as. i used to be so caring, now im turning out more and more like my father. i hope i get no worse than this; i used to be so nice. i still am - but i can just see where im headed. doesnt every son who dreads to be his father inevitably do so? growing up without the dire need of my parents attention left me looking else where. my niche was through the television. i was the first child and obviously the experiment/project set up for failure from the get-go. i guess my parents were psychics because they saw me going nowhere way before my path to failure was even laid out. one big difference between the fictional tv plots and my life - i end up with no dramatic possibly bittersweet ending full of twists and turns, courage, overcoming, triumph, revenge, happiness, and so forth. my life has been everything but that. and i can almost foresee my unbearable conclusion.
from stop lights, satalites, police vehicles, and public restrooms; the things you do - they dont go unseen. when you look up to the sky-tonight-just know they're looking back at you. i can see you perfectly through your glass house. perfectly sifting through and seeing into your every dream.
im just in a really blah mood, and i wish i could rid myself of it. right now i wish i could put a bullet in every face of every person whos ever done me wrong uttering the words "i blame you for my problem, not myself, selfish i know, but so is the world" though i dont believe that would come out quite as quickly as the bullet that comes out of its casing and directly into your face. so, the only words leaving my mouth - "yeah, well..." unless i was the scatman. ;D ive noticed im so completely unable to love the people i care for the most. with every coming experience i gain in life, i seem to lose just alittle bit more of myself, the person i once saw myself as. i used to be so caring, now im turning out more and more like my father. i hope i get no worse than this; i used to be so nice. i still am - but i can just see where im headed. doesnt every son who dreads to be his father inevitably do so? growing up without the dire need of my parents attention left me looking else where. my niche was through the television. i was the first child and obviously the experiment/project set up for failure from the get-go. i guess my parents were psychics because they saw me going nowhere way before my path to failure was even laid out. one big difference between the fictional tv plots and my life - i end up with no dramatic possibly bittersweet ending full of twists and turns, courage, overcoming, triumph, revenge, happiness, and so forth. my life has been everything but that. and i can almost foresee my unbearable conclusion.
from stop lights, satalites, police vehicles, and public restrooms; the things you do - they dont go unseen. when you look up to the sky-tonight-just know they're looking back at you. i can see you perfectly through your glass house. perfectly sifting through and seeing into your every dream.