Sometimes, I wonder if I'll be good at counseling, since I can be so judgmental. But I realize that I can suspend my outward expression of it while funneling the energy into providing new perspective. I do it quite frequently in social situations, actually. Contrary to popular opinion, therapists aren't there to give advice or make decisions for their clients; they merely offer guidance so that clients can make better decisions for themselves. I tend to like a lot of Socratic questioning while keeping in mind the clients' ultimate goals, since it's best not to assume. The point is to widen narrow views of their situations and offer alternatives.
Some recent examples of "performance" give me hope as an amateur. At an interview last week, the interviewer eventually delved into her own family history and told me she doesn't normally do that while interviewing, but I'm good at saying the right things to get people to open up. Excellent. A previous group interview during which we the interviewees split into dyads to demonstrate mini-counseling sessions with each other showed me I had more skills than I realized. I got rave reviews from both the others and the interviewers and was offered a position (which I won't take, since this family center near the airport isn't even close to my first choice). They noted that I have a decidedly directive style. This means I tell people what to do in a subtle, therapeutic way. I encouraged the girl to come up with her own plans and solutions as I explored the problem from every angle. I think this works for some people but not others, so I'll have to keep a handle on that tendency and read the client well. Some people just want somebody to listen and acknowledge their feelings so that a broken attachment style can be mended.
And, tonight, I was able to deflect a small quarrel in a group of four by strategically changing the subject to something of common (and neutral) interest. It's something I wasn't always able to do, but I've done it several times now. I'm getting better at being aware of processes and taking action to direct discussions toward a desirable track. No doubt, I'll be working with therapy groups in the future, since it's part of my licensing requirements. I'm still concerned about my very occasional non-normal days when I'm totally lost in groups, which is dependent on my physical state. Oh well, nobody's "on" every day.
Some recent examples of "performance" give me hope as an amateur. At an interview last week, the interviewer eventually delved into her own family history and told me she doesn't normally do that while interviewing, but I'm good at saying the right things to get people to open up. Excellent. A previous group interview during which we the interviewees split into dyads to demonstrate mini-counseling sessions with each other showed me I had more skills than I realized. I got rave reviews from both the others and the interviewers and was offered a position (which I won't take, since this family center near the airport isn't even close to my first choice). They noted that I have a decidedly directive style. This means I tell people what to do in a subtle, therapeutic way. I encouraged the girl to come up with her own plans and solutions as I explored the problem from every angle. I think this works for some people but not others, so I'll have to keep a handle on that tendency and read the client well. Some people just want somebody to listen and acknowledge their feelings so that a broken attachment style can be mended.
And, tonight, I was able to deflect a small quarrel in a group of four by strategically changing the subject to something of common (and neutral) interest. It's something I wasn't always able to do, but I've done it several times now. I'm getting better at being aware of processes and taking action to direct discussions toward a desirable track. No doubt, I'll be working with therapy groups in the future, since it's part of my licensing requirements. I'm still concerned about my very occasional non-normal days when I'm totally lost in groups, which is dependent on my physical state. Oh well, nobody's "on" every day.