Here's some campagin promises I know will be a hit!
If elected President- I would first and foremost legalize gay marriage. If you do not like this- may I suggest a long term vacation to Mexico? I hear the weather is always lovely there, plus it would be all you can eat tacos ALL THE TIME!!
Then, in no certain order I would do the following...
I would abolish the freedom of speech rights for anyone associated with the Westboro Baptist Church. You do not have the right to speak and/or protest at the funerals of fallen soldiers. If you are caught doing these things- you will be drawn and quartered by a motorcycle group of my choosing at said funeral for all those to laugh and point at you!
I will bring our troops home! You heard me, all our men and women in combat would be brought home to their familes immediately! As a distraction to those willing them harm- the distraction assualt- "Operation F.U." will be a bevey of tattooed beauties offering nakedness and pork products to the insurgents. Then, with a flick of my wrist- I will stratigically drop three nuclear bombs in a certain arid climate- rendering it a glass parking lot- thus ending any and all conflicts in the Middle East!
I will bring Wall Street to bear by pulling the rich bastards into the open from their private gated fortresses of wealth, forcing them to live in the most broken down parts of Detroit City while we, the 99%, divide their wealth amongst ourselves!
I will end any and all argument over abortion. A woman's body is a woman's body and only she can make the proper choice in regards to an abortion. Add to that- I will make birth control available to every woman who chooses to use it. I may also go so far as to make sure some women in the population are sterilized for the nations benefit.
I will make it mandatory for those wishing to draw on welfare, W.I.C. and other wise- you shall pass not one but three drug tests *(given at random) along with a full background check and finiancial run down prior to being given a three month probabtionary trial of welfare. You break the rules- buh bye. No more free food for you! If you are found out to be buying crap food and unhuman amounts of soda for your kids- done. No more.
I will offer you, the voting public, copies of my birth certificate, tax record filings, and a tour of my home if needs be- I will be as transparent as humanly possible- barring any scientific discoveries that would make actualy transperancy possible.
Michelle Premer for President- 2012!!!
If elected President- I would first and foremost legalize gay marriage. If you do not like this- may I suggest a long term vacation to Mexico? I hear the weather is always lovely there, plus it would be all you can eat tacos ALL THE TIME!!
Then, in no certain order I would do the following...
I would abolish the freedom of speech rights for anyone associated with the Westboro Baptist Church. You do not have the right to speak and/or protest at the funerals of fallen soldiers. If you are caught doing these things- you will be drawn and quartered by a motorcycle group of my choosing at said funeral for all those to laugh and point at you!
I will bring our troops home! You heard me, all our men and women in combat would be brought home to their familes immediately! As a distraction to those willing them harm- the distraction assualt- "Operation F.U." will be a bevey of tattooed beauties offering nakedness and pork products to the insurgents. Then, with a flick of my wrist- I will stratigically drop three nuclear bombs in a certain arid climate- rendering it a glass parking lot- thus ending any and all conflicts in the Middle East!
I will bring Wall Street to bear by pulling the rich bastards into the open from their private gated fortresses of wealth, forcing them to live in the most broken down parts of Detroit City while we, the 99%, divide their wealth amongst ourselves!
I will end any and all argument over abortion. A woman's body is a woman's body and only she can make the proper choice in regards to an abortion. Add to that- I will make birth control available to every woman who chooses to use it. I may also go so far as to make sure some women in the population are sterilized for the nations benefit.
I will make it mandatory for those wishing to draw on welfare, W.I.C. and other wise- you shall pass not one but three drug tests *(given at random) along with a full background check and finiancial run down prior to being given a three month probabtionary trial of welfare. You break the rules- buh bye. No more free food for you! If you are found out to be buying crap food and unhuman amounts of soda for your kids- done. No more.
I will offer you, the voting public, copies of my birth certificate, tax record filings, and a tour of my home if needs be- I will be as transparent as humanly possible- barring any scientific discoveries that would make actualy transperancy possible.
Michelle Premer for President- 2012!!!