I don't goto meetings, I haven't been given any coins, I'm still a "bad parent" but I keep trying. She fights, screams and yells because she wants peace. I "shut down" because if she thinks she is right, everyone else is wrong, screaming and asking the same questions about happened is pointless. I started drinking because I had no control of this cycle. I stopped drinking because it was controlling me, putting others in danger. I want my kids to learn from their mistakes and try harder next time, not demean them, call them names and insure they have no confidence. How do you instill confidence when you don't have any? How do you get kids to talk less and think more, by constantly criticizing every little insignificant action they make? It's enough to make me start drinking...again. But I don't. I have no desire, no temptation, I just don't, because it didn't help before. I just keep trying, because that's what I do.