incorect

I was supposed to go to qxts last night, but I had some sort of weird panic attack/cardiac arrest/ near death experience so i decided I'd better stay in. Didn't want dani to know i was still having these little episodes so I told her my father wasn't letting me go out. Boy, was she pissed. Errr my chest hurts. Today was one of the nicest days I've had in a long time. I went to MKHS to work on the sets with rachel, but they were doing some asbestos work so we had to leave... so Rachel and I went to this awesome park, climbed rocks, layed around and had some pretty good conversations by a huge waterfall. It was lovely. Tonight will be nice as well. I feel as though the fog is lifting. I have a boner

It's never occured to me before, but I so many of my dreams are about either infinity or marriage.

The latter's just a random neurosis; weddings used tocreep me out, for no particular reason. But the formerI've never grasped how the prospect of eternity could be anything besides terrifying. (Tuck Everlastingso scary.) No novelty can avoid fading into ennui eventually, whether it takes weeks or milenia. The thought of being condemned to a continous onslaught of experiences that will never ever stop absolutely gives me the jeeblies.

Right. Well, allow me tp leave you with thought. I'm off to subvert the dominant paradigm. Unless I go play the sickeningly cute piggy game instead...so tempting...