Login
Forgot Password?

OR

Login with Google Login with Twitter Login with Facebook
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • SuicideGirls
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
Vital Stats

in_decission

Milwaukee-ish, WI

Member Since 2004

Followers 2 Following 1

  • Everything
  • Photos
  • Video
  • Blogs
  • Groups
  • From Others

Thursday May 05, 2005

May 5, 2005
0
  • Facebook
  • Tweet
  • Email
"Dreams are made winding through my head"

I beat up someone I hang out with on weekends, a little bloody. I ran from the police through a distorted version of my hometown, seeing as they finally put a gas station on that vacant corner across from the car shop, down the street from the bike trail. That, and the streets of my moderately populated town were packed like Mardi Gras. The girl I was hitting on at a party last week was spreading rumors about me cheating on my then ex-girlfriend. The studio executives had to tear down my room so that a season of Oz could be filmed there. Some other friends were tossing clay pizzas up into the trees and it looked like the melting clocks from a Dali painting, hanging from the branches. Then there was my Gramma...just as I remembered her, before the stroke, before she fell down the stairs. We hugged and held each other for what seemed like a perfect eternity. Then she looked down at her aged, thin skin, so smooth...I just told her 'I don't know why' I don't know why things have to grow old and die. I told her I loved her. It might sound crazy but I felt her presence, that peaceful, caring warmth, her smile. God I miss my Gramma sometimes. Life's been telling me to stop being so afraid in these subtle ways lately, through dreams, through old men on the bike trail shouting random things like 'be not afraid!' as they pass by on their schwinn bicycles...I'm glad my dreams came back to me, I missed dreams so much, but then again I was holding myself back so long. At least there's forgiveness in this world, even for a twisted up bastard like me.

More Blogs

  • 04.05.09
    0

    Sunday Apr 05, 2009

    why do i even try? all signs point to no.
  • 03.30.09
    0

    Tuesday Mar 31, 2009

    You know that feeling where something that's always been a part of yo…
  • 03.26.09
    0

    Friday Mar 27, 2009

    a birthday present for a very old friend: days bathed in acid …
  • 03.20.09
    0

    Saturday Mar 21, 2009

    a quarter of a century or a fraction of a second, it makes no differe…
  • 03.11.09
    0

    Wednesday Mar 11, 2009

    Well it's been about a month of being exhausted, unmotivated, and gen…
  • 02.25.09
    0

    Wednesday Feb 25, 2009

    Whoever reactivated my account, you motherfucking rock! I'll hav…
  • 10.13.05
    0

    Friday Oct 14, 2005

    Autolux-Got my sleep on. Qotsa-I'm good with the CD tracks, thanks…
  • 10.11.05
    2

    Wednesday Oct 12, 2005

    Nine Inch Nails tomorrow..... Learning songs today..... too eng…
  • 10.08.05
    0

    Sunday Oct 09, 2005

    "Try to get some sleep, Joe........at regular hours?" I do not lik…
  • 09.30.05
    1

    Friday Sep 30, 2005

    Read More

We at SuicideGirls have been celebrating alternative pin-up girls for:

23
years
11
months
30
days
  • 5,509,826 fans
  • 41,393 fans
  • 10,327,617 followers
  • 4,608 SuicideGirls
  • 1,112,987 followers
  • 14,969,624 photos
  • 321,315 followers
  • 61,512,431 comments
  • Join
  • Profiles
  • Groups
  • Photos
  • Videos
  • Shop
  • Help
  • About
  • Press
  • LIVE

Legal/Tos | DMCA | Privacy Policy | 18 U.S.C. 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement | Contact Us | Vendo Payment Support
©SuicideGirls 2001-2025

Press enter to search
Fast Hi-res

Click here to join & see it all...

Crop your photo