imspectr

A few of my favorite "texts from last night"

*** found on http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/worst-nights/ ***

(516): onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
(443): he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?


(612): What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?


(216): Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
(440): Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
(216): Holy shit r u serious? How?
(440): Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.


(843): happy early fathers day!!!
(829): im not a father
(843): about that...


(602): Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
****ewwww that's from here in Phoenix****


(602): So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
(623): What did she do!?
(602): I didn't tell her..
***ummmmmmmmm......what!?***


(602): no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.